Biker 1/2 Cycle 1 - Birth of a Modern Legend

Book 2: Severed

Chapters 01-03

by Calum Wallace

=====

LEGALISTIC SHIT and RANT
None of it's my fault. It never is.

After trying to come up with a logical way to send my plan into action
for six fucking months I finally ran out of patience today. Screw the
plotline I'd come up with for the first half of book 2, it refused to
work no matter how much I hit it. Screw plans, I'm going to salvage what
shreds I can and fill in the gaps with what you've all come to expect -
random madness.
Thus, without more ado, it's on with the show. Let's Rock.

Words in "{this}" kind of brackets are spoken in Cantonese. Those in
"[this]" are in wolf-speak.

Biker 1/2 Cycle 1 - Birth of a Modern Legend, book 2: Severed.

Chapter 1: Recovery.
"Lord please take away my fears / Before I drown in sorrow / one last
thing that I'll say / how will I laugh tomorrow / when I can't even
smile today?"
- Suicidal Tendencies, 'How will I laugh tomorrow.'

"It was like trying to wake up from a nightmare... then realising I
wasn't asleep, it  was real and I would never escape from it." - Nabiki
Tendo.

***********************************

What now acted as a typical morning in the Saotome-Tendo household was a
lot different to two weeks before.
Two weeks before the day would have began with Kasumi getting up and
starting to prepare breakfast. Next Mortise and Ranko would arrive back
from a night in vampiric society. Within a few minutes of the two undead
lovers arriving home Ranma, Akane and Shampoo would be up. The three of
them would rouse Ryoga and Mao Xing then the whole gang would go off for
an early morning blat, a routine Nabiki had just started joining in
with. By the time they arrived home the rest of the family (Soun and
Genma with the possible addition of Nodoka) would be up and about. On
arriving home all the martial artists in the family would go outside for
their pre-breakfast practise session - Soun and Genma would spar,
Shampoo would continue training Akane, Ranma and Ryoga would intersperse
sparring with lending the others their expert advice and Mortise would
continue teaching Ranko vampiring. When she was there Nodoka and Shampoo
often sparred; of late Nabiki had been joining Shampoo and Akane's
training session. This would have them well ready for breakfast by the
time Kasumi had it prepared.
Not this last two weeks. Kasumi's cooking was about the only thing that
hadn't changed - the only member of the family who did any practising
these days was Nabiki who was in the Amazon beginners class getting
trained by kids half her age and being very careful not to shapeshift.
Mao spent most of his time by his comatose sister's side, Nodoka was
still hospitalised and Akane just sat in the living room beside the huge
scuffed black GSXR-1100 they had fished out of the ruined end of the SCC
workshop. Ranma's ratbike was one damn tough piece of engineering - it
had been knocked over by a tank then had a quarter of a ton of building
dropped on it from a height of twelve feet and only suffered a few more
dents and scrapes in the paintwork.
There was one miracle in it all; fifteen hours after the battle, an
Amazon who had been trying to identify some of the dead saw a faint but
perceptible rise and fall in Genma Saotome's chest. Amazon healers were
rushed in and they declared the tough old werebear still very much
alive.
As Genma had once claimed, it took a lot to keep that particular bear
down.
Like Shampoo, he was still unconcious; his hyperimmune system was still
trying to repair the massive injuries he had suffered. It seemed Ranma
had unwittingly saved Genma's life when he pulled the chunk of
splintered pavement out of his supposedly dead father's chest.
Nabiki sat and stared at the sunrise. She was in full Ice Queen mode,
bottling up her emotions. She fished out a cigarette and watched the
Amazon children playing before morning class. None of the Amazon kids
younger than ten went to school. By the time they were that age they
were better fighters than most martial artists would ever be.
One little girl had taken quite a shine to Nabiki. The kid's father had
died in an accident some years back and her mother had died in the
battle two short weeks ago. She was scared and alone; pretty much how
Nabiki felt.
The kid - named Su Li - walked quietly over to Nabiki and sat down
beside the teenage girl.
"Nabiki?"
"Hmm?"
"Nabiki, will you be my mummy?"
To say Nabiki Tendo was astounded by the request would be an
understatement.
"Fgm-ngrk-mmnrph-"
She stopped spluttering when she saw the at once earnest, eager and
worried look on the little girl's face. Nabiki stood up and offered Su a
hand.
"Well, Su-chan. Let's go talk to Elder Mi Soon, huh?"
"Okay!"
They walked together across the street to Mi Soon's house. Nabiki
couldn't believe the speed the Amazons had rebuilt the rubble-strewn
patch of real estate Colonel Honda had had given to them - houses,
firing ranges, training halls, everything an Amazon village could wish
for had been built where ordinary Japanese houses had once stood. Oh,
and a hanger with attendant helipad for Nabiki's pet helicopter.
The old-yet-young Amazon was sitting on the bench in front of her house
and smoking her pipe when Nabiki arrived.
"Hello, Nabiki. What brings you here?"
"Good morning, Honoured Elder. Um... I don't know quite how to put this,
but..."
Mi Soon shot her a knowing smile. "I overheard young Su Li asking you to
adopt her. We will need to discuss this with the Council of Elders...
but I for one don't see any problems if you're willing. The child has no
surviving relatives closer than her cousins, she certainly needs someone
to care for her."
Nabiki nodded. "I'll do it."
Mi Soon grinned. "Good for you. Your willingness to undertake such a
responsibility at such a young age underlines why I have such a high
opinion of you."
That brought a rare smile to the middle Tendo girl's face. Little Su let
out a squeal of joy and jumped up to hug Nabiki.

***********************************

Mi Soon watched Nabiki cross back to the Saotome-Tendo house with Su in
her arms. She chuckled quietly to herself - an active, adventurous child
like Su Li should help bring Nabiki out of her fugue of self-pity.
Now, how to help Akane... She finished her pipe and headed inside,
destination her collection of books and scrolls.
"Damnit, if only I had Kou Loun's books... There must be something can
be done about Akane's eyes. There MUST be!"

***********************************

Akane Saotome stared sightlessly across the living room. Her hand was
resting on the saddle of Ranma's bike.
It was all she had left of him.
That and the as yet tiny life that was sheltered within her womb. She
fumbled with the stereo for a bit then found the CD player play button.
That hand grenade had delivered an incredibly cruel blow; it had blinded
her in both eyes. Dr. Tofu hadn't pulled any punches; he told her
straight out that she would never see again.
The only light in Akane's suddenly dark world was what Mi Soon had told
her the evening before. Firstly Shampoo. Despite having been driven
over, first by an Amerai spider tank then a JGSDF main battle tank,
despite being badly shot up the werewolf girl would live. She and Genma
were both far from healed; according to Po Da it was probably a mercy
since both having your legs squashed paper thin or breathing through a
hole in your chest happen to be extremely painful experiences. Then
there was the fact Mi Soon thought she recognised the spell that the
Conservative Amazon magus had cast on the melee containing Ranma, and if
she was right there was no way in hell he was dead, because the only
spell Mi Soon knew of that smelt like that was a dimensional teleport.
Mi Soon was sure the Conservatives had mixed a few other spells into the
attack, but Akane had grasped onto that suspicion like a drowning girl
clutching at a lifebouy.
Ranma would be back.
And then everything would be okay.

***********************************

Three hundred miles away from the battered Neriman suburb another
teenager, marginally taller and with that air of tough independence you
only find in self-employed working class people, was just climbing into
his scruffy ex-army Land Rover SWB 110. The 4x4 in question was a Series
1; the original model of Land Rover, tougher than old boots and fitted
together like Meccano.
This one looked as battered as something that had survived both Battles
of Nerima. It had uncracked windows and a set of decent tyres, but that
was about the only visible parts that weren't bent, dented, scuffed or
otherwise damaged. From the way mud was smeared up the sides of it's
ramshackle bodywork it was obvious this particular Land Rover had been
rolled at least once, and if it was once it had to have rolled right
over and back onto it's wheels since those telltale mud smears were on
both sides and it's roof.
The youth glared at his sister who had just climbed into the passenger
seat. "Shove off, Yukiko. I'm going to do this alone like Dad said." He
jerked his thumb at the open motorbike magazine that was lying on the
dashboard.
"Fuck Dad, he doesn't know who we're about to mess with. I've got Guild
training. Like, sure, I don't agree with all of their opinions, but the
fact remains you're going to start a fight with one of the toughest
werebears in Japan and his son, who's probably just as mean. You need my
help and you know it, Ukyo."
Ukyo sighed. "I don't want you getting hurt, jackass."
"You may be better at our family style but I am a demon hunter with
combat experience. You want me to stay back, you're going to have to
make me."
"Yukiko you twat!"
"Stop being a moron, start driving. Oh, and pocket these Glock 17's.
They've got multiammo, you'll need them."
"Multiammo?"
Yukiko groaned. "Ukyo you twat! Don't you ever listen to anything I tell
you? It's a Kirth Arms design, hollow copper slugs filled with a mix of
silver and graphite balls in a holy water-aconite mix. Ideal for dealing
with hostile vampires, Amerai, Loup-Garou and Dopplegangers, which
pretty much covers the spectrum of common or garden supernaturals. Of
course, if you're dealing with true demons you'd need a firetruck loaded
with holy water, the smidge that's in those bullets hardly more than
gives *them* a nasty bruise. But the Amerai keep Tokyo pretty clear of
demons, they've got a better chance against them than us humans. Any
rate, what's the plan?"
"First we need to scout out the area. Find out exactly where those
arseholes are staying. Then challenge them individually, and kill them."
"Well, sharpen your battle spat, you'll need to behead them. Only easy
way to kill an Amerai. How about I wolfsbane 'em a few hours before the
fight? That way they can't shapeshift and shred you."
"Yeah... this is gonna be so easy."
"No. It's not. Those two may be scum, but don't underestimate them.
Amerai, especially experienced werecritters like Genma Saotome, are
bloody dangerous even if you do manage to wolfsbane 'em. And with Clan
Saotome's war against their offshoot Joketsuzo - well, if you have to
kill a shapeshifter every time you get in a fight you end up EXTREMELY
good. If you don't play your cards right they'll chew you up and spit
out the pips."

***********************************

Nabiki was showing Su how to use a computer when Mi Soon and two other
Amazon elders found them.
"Ah, there you are. It's time for the council to discuss your offer to
adopt the child Su Li."
Su bowed to the varied Elders. Nabiki followed suit.
They followed the trio of old-yet-young women to the new council
chamber.

***********************************

Mi Soon stepped up onto the speaker's stool. It was about six inches
high and would be tossed round to whoever had the next turn speaking.
"Well now, I suspect we all know why we are assembled here."
Varied bored comments answered that.
"Good. Nabiki Tendo may have little in the way of unarmed combat skill,
but I for one believe an intelligent and brave warrior like her would
make an excellent adoptive mother for the child Su Li. Her skill with
helicopter gunships is clearly evident and she has also proved her
ability to ferret out valuable information from extremely powerful
sources. And the respect in which Lord Packmaster Ranma Saotome holds
her is another indicator of her suitability." She paused. "Does anyone
have anything they would like to add to that?"
Another elder - Po Da - nodded sharply. Mi Soon tossed her the stool.
"Ah, thankyou. I agree with Mi Soon. The child has clearly become quite
fond of Warrior Nabiki and Warrior Nabiki of she. I believe refusing to
permit Warrior Nabiki to adopt the child Su Li - only surviving
descendant of the most forward-thinking Warrior our people have seen in
some six centuries, with the noticeably exception of Honoured Elder Mi
Soon - would not only be unnecessarily cruel, it would go against what
Warrior Shi Lan would have wished for her daughter." She stepped off the
stool and held it up, offering it to her fellow Elders. One of them
nodded sharply, indicating she wished to speak.
She leapt up to catch the stool, landing neatly on it.
"Thankyou. While both the previous speakers have raised valid points, I
would be concerned about the battle skills of the child Su Li were she
raised by someone who has so little martial skill. Warrior Nabiki, what
do you say to that?"
The woman tossed the stool to Nabiki in an easy skimming throw. Nabiki
caught it neatly and stepped onto it.
"Um - thankyou. I can hopefully allay your concerns, Honoured Elder.
While I may not be able to hold my own in a martial arts duel, Honoured
Elder Mi Soon will attest to my marksmanship and I am sure all of you
witnessed my ability to use the incredibly hard to control weapon system
known as a Hind D. Honoured Elders, the battlefield has changed greatly
in the last two or three centuries. While some of you may believe - and
I mean no insult - that helicopter gunships, assault rifles and main
battle tanks are a newfangled fad,"- That raised an appreciative chuckle
-"It is my humble opinion that skill with high-tech weaponry is as
important to the Amazon way of life as skill with sword and fist. As I
guess you know I'm doing my level best to regain the martial arts skills
I abandoned after my mother died, but my place in battle is with a
flying tank strapped to my back. War is increasingly becoming a place
for intelligent, highly educated personnel with a wide range of
technical expertise. As weaponry becomes more advanced and more deadly
at greater range it also becomes increasingly complex, and I believe
that skill with high tech equipment is just as important as skill in
melee combat. As someone who possesses that skill - well, I believe that
there is much of great value that I can teach the future Warrior Su Li
and her Amazon sisters."
She stepped off the stool. smiling with obvious satisfaction at the
murmurs of consent. There was a thoughtful silence then another Elder
nodded. Nabiki tossed the stool to her.
"Ah, thankyou. Honoured Elder Lao, I for one believe Warrior Nabiki is a
greatly skilled and valuable member of the Amazon community. Half of my
sept would be dead if it wasn't for Warrior Nabiki's timely intervention
with her chopper, and as the only other person in this room ever to
pilot a rotary winged aircraft I can attest to the degree of skill a
helicopter takes to fly. You may remember the Hind we had for a few
months back in the Motherland? How many of our finest Warriors were able
to pilot that machine? None would even dare attempt it. Warrior Nabiki
not only dares, she excels. Do we look down on our Magi for their low
level of conventional battle skills? No, for to do so would be the mark
of a fool. Do we look down on Master Sniper Lin-Lin? No, for her hands a
heavy rifle can reach out and strike down our enemies finest warriors
from over a mile away, before they have even caught sight of our
Warriors. In the same vein we must NEVER underrate the expertise and
lethality of a combat helicopter pilot."
Mi Soon nodded as the other Elder stepped down.
"Thankyou... Honoured Elders, Blooded Warrior. As highest ranking Elder
present I hereby confirm Warrior Nabiki Tendo as the first Amazon Master
of the art of attack helicopter combat. She joins a small cabal of our
Warriors sisters who have chosen a modern Art to excel in; Master Sniper
Lin-Lin, Master Gunner Sao Wang, Master Gunner Lan-Lan and the sadly
deceased Master Sniper Shi Lan. Now, does any other have any objections
to Master Pilot Nabiki Tendo's adoption of the child Su Li? Speak now or
forever hold your peace."
She stepped off the stool. Nobody nodded.
Mi Soon waited for a few moments the stepped back onto the stool.
"Excellent. Congratulations, Master Pilot. It's a Warrior. You are
henceforth responsible for the ascension of Su Li to expertise in
whatever Art you and she choose for her. I strongly suggest
marksmanship; her mother Master Sniper Shi Lan was probably the best
shot the Amazon Nation has ever seen and I believe she would be most
disappointed to see her only heir a poor shot."
The collected Elders bowed to Nabiki; Nabiki and Su Li bowed back.
Mi Soon smiled. "Very good. Master Pilot Nabiki, you have permission to
goabout your daily business. Honoured Elders, before we continue to
discussthe Fifth Reform, is there any other personal business that need
be broughtbefore the council?"
Po Da nodded. Mi Soon tossed her the stool.
"Thankyou. I would like to request an increase in the cash allocated
toupkeep of our vehicles; here in Japan we have ready access to
sparecomponents, yet our trucks are still in woeful condition..."
Nabiki left, Su Li keeping right beside her.

***********************************

Kasumi slid out of under her Corvette, swearing as she did so.
"Like, goddamn Consies! Like, shooting up my hot-rod! I'm gonna kinda
kicktheir butts if I see those like, dweebs again!"
Mu Tze peered at her. "Oh, it's you, Kasumi."
"Dude, you are really kinda, short sighted... Hey, I got a kewl idea,
man!Why don't you get contacts?"
Mu Tze pushed his glasses down and shot her a confused look through
them.
"What the hell are contacts?"
Kasumi stared at him for a second, removed one of her contact lenses
andshowed it to him. "Like, these, man. They're like, spectacles that
slide in under you like, eyelids, man." She giggled. "I'm just as like,
short sighted as you are, man. But these kinda correct it, man. Kiss the
like, blur goodbye!"
"That's incredible!"
"They're like, great, man. I've got these other ones that make my eyes
look like cat eyes, cool huh? I usta look like a real dweeb, man, back
when I wore glasses."
"Where do I go to get these contact lenses?"
"Can you cope with like, really really fast driving? Because if you can
come with me, man. There may still be loadsa bullet holes in the
bodywork but I've got my like, hot-rod running again."
Mu Tze nodded. "If it starts to freak me out I'll take my spectacles
off. That way I won't be able to see enough to get frightened."
Kasumi shot him a loony stoned grin. "Like, let's rock, man!" She dived
through the driver's window. Mu Tze followed suit through the
passenger's window.
Kasumi fired the engine and stuffed an Ultraviolence album intothe
stereo. 'Hardcore Motherfucker' started thundering out of the biggest
set of motorised speakers in Japan. She thumped the garage door remote
then did a rolling burnout and handbrake turn into the street and away.

***********************************

About half an hour later, Mu Tze looked round with the new prescription
of contact lenses in - the optician couldn't believe his eyes when he
saw just how short-sighted the Chinese boy was - and had his first
totally clear look at a woman, ie the madly grinning stoned face of
Kasumi 'Road Hazard' Tendo.
Her face was the most beautiful sight he had ever seen...

Once more unto the next chapter, my fine friends!

NOTES
Next - Just Add Kounji!
NB - Kasumi 'Road Hazard' Tendo is entitled to her own opinion of
eyeglasses, and the author does not share that opinion - I've met people
who look downright wrong without their specs.
Like, later dudes.
Calum 'Doghead' Wallace.

GLOSSARY OF TERMS
Alternator - Higher tech version of a generator.

Artic - The UK term for a semi truck. Short for 'articulated lorry'.

Binned - crashed. Normally means written off. Derived from 'bin' as in
'rubbish bin' (the British term for a trash can)

Chain lube - Motorbike chain lubrication oil. Comes in a spray can and
looks a bit like snot.

Conrod (connecting rod) - The bit of metal that connects the piston to
the crankshaft. Shaped approximately like a flat dumbbell.

Engine clicking - An internal combustion engine heats up when run. Run
it hard and it heats up more, then when you switch off the engine will
start emitting a series of sharp clicks as the metal cools and
contracts.

Final drive - the drive chain that goes from the gearbox to the back
wheel and the cogs (final drive sprockets) that it runs on. Not to be
confused with the primary drive - the chain/sprocket or belt/pulleys
between the engine and gearbox.

Gasflowing - trimming off excess metal from inside the cylinder heads to
aid the burn rate of fuel within the engine. Gives a small horsepower
boost.

Gixer - Slang for a Suzuki GSXR (one of the craziest bikes they make).

Header tank - Tank that contains the spare water for the radiator on a
sealed cooling system as found in most cars and some high performance
bikes.

Honda CG125 - Small single - cylinder 4-stroke road bike. Not very much
of anything but supremely reliable and dirt cheap. It's reliability
stems from having very little to go wrong and a low - revving 4-stroke
engine.

Honda 250 Superdream - CB250. The next up the Honda model range from the
CG125 and just a bigger version of the same.

Honda 500 Superdream - CB500. A CB250 with a bigger bore and heavier
frame.

Honda Fireblade - Insane Honda sportsbike. Mad but beginning to show
it's age.

Kill switch - The engine's 'off' switch. Turns off power to the
ignition.

Lid / skidlid - Slang for a crash helmet.

Nitrous oxide - Laughing gas. A petrol - nitrous mix burns faster than a
petrol - air mix therefore produces more horsepower and more wear in the
engine.

Ratbike - A motorbike made to look as fucked up and unroadworthy as
possible while still being street legal. Normally painted flat black.

Steering damper - a long, thin shock absorber that fits between the
forks and the frame. Helps steady the steering. A steering damper is
essential for disabled bikers who have lost the use of one arm as
without it there's no way you'd be able to steer at low speed or pull
away one armed.

Stocker - unmodified factory-built vehicle; I think this comes from the
term 'sales stock'.

Supercharger - A pump driven off the crank that forces more air into the
engine thus forcing it to run faster.

Toby - An Inverness Collegeism; slang meaning something along the lines
of widget, gizmo or thingy. Derived from angling parlarance (toby = a
small wooden fish used as a lure.) May be related to the epithet 'Toby
Tishbein' and can be said 'Tobyracho' for no apparent reason. (I'm not
making this up! Honest!)

Top yoke - The yokes are two pieces of metal that hold the front forks
together and  to the bike. The top yoke is the upper one. Known as
triple clamps in the US.

JASDF - Japanese Air Self Defence Force. The Japanese air force.

JGSDF - Japanese Ground Self Defence Force. The ground forces arm of the
Japanese military.

JSDF - Japanese Self Defence Force. The collective Japanese armed
forces.

What likes - Slack Scottish grammar. Means something along the lines of
'please could you explain that' or 'what would you like to talk about'.
Only considerably less posh.

Wheelie bin - a square green plastic trashcan about the size of a normal
bin, with a flip top and two wheels.

------------------------------

From: "Doghead Thirteen" <wolfman@gehenna.fsnet.co.uk>
Subject: [Ranma][FanFic] Biker 1/2 book 02 chapter 02
X-Original-Date: Sun, 22 Sep 2002 05:14:13 +0100

LEGALISTIC SHIT and RANT
You know what? I still refuse to accept responsibility.

Yup, it's still not dead. I think this is gonna work.
I hope.

Words in "{this}" kind of brackets are spoken in Cantonese. Those in
"[this]" are in wolf-speak.

Biker 1/2 Cycle 1 - Birth of a Modern Legend, book 2: Severed.

Chapter 2: Just add Kounji.
"My lips are numb my mind is numb and my will is numb" - SPF1000,
'Consumption'

"Yukiko was talking bullshit when she said Saotomes are hard. She
deserved an understatement of the damn *millennium* award for that
one... pity I had the wrong target." - Ukyo Kounji, reminiscing to
grandchildren, April 2044.

***********************************

Ukyo Kounji was tired and bored senseless. Driving several hundred miles
instead of sleeping tends to do that. The only reason he'd managed to
stay on the road was because of a large collection of pirated Guns 'N'
Roses and Iron Maiden tapes.
How Yukiko managed to sleep through the 1980's finest was anyone's
guess.
He pulled up in the transportcafe carpark just outside Nerima, switched
the stereo off and proceeded to faceplant the steering wheel as he went
from 'zombie' to 'log' in 2.5 seconds flat.
Yukiko woke up an hour later to find Ukyo snoring face down on the
steering wheel, which was unusual since Ukyo didn't normally snore.
She moved him to the passenger's seat, found a supermarket car park in
town and went out for a little walk.

***********************************

Nabiki and Su were just leaving the shop when a Hunter Guild symbol
seemed to jump out of the crowd at them. Nabiki's hand was on the pistol
grip of her MP5K by the time she realised the teenager wearing the Guild
wristband had innocently walked into her.
"Shit, can't you watch where you're going?"
"Sorry, got something on my mind." The demon hunter hurried off.
Nabiki glared at her back for several seconds, shrugged and headed for
her bike.
Yukiko heard the growl of a motorbike firing up. Being a motocross
enthusiast she glanced over.
And promptly got the fright of her life. The wasp-striped turboed CB was
the most blatant and brutal looking bike she'd seen in nearly ten years.
She grinned and continued heading for the suburb of Nerima mentioned in
the advert Ukyo had pulled Genma Saotome's address from.

***********************************

"Heya like, Nabiki. You look like you've seen a like, ghost."
"Nah, worse than that. A demon hunter literally walked into me while I
was buying Su clothes... that mundie gave me a hell of a fright." She
dumped her sub-machine gun on the sideboard and made a couple of cheese
sandwiches.
"A like, demon hunter? How'd you like, know?"
"Because I happen to know their rank badges. She was an Initiate, that's
something like a line soldier. They wear these wristbands so they can
spot each other, it stops fuckups where different guilds end up
accidentally hunting each other's troops. I mean, there's some places
the only human stupid enough to hang out is a demon hunter. I'm going to
talk to Nodoka, see if she can tell me anything about the Guild in
question. If that girl's from the one who declared open war on any and
all supernaturals we'll have to get the Hell rid of her and fast."

***********************************

Yukiko noticed the change in the building style instantly. One moment
fairly typical Japanese houses. The next moment very new and more
Chinese-looking buildings.
She paused and ran her rank bracelet up her sleeve before proceeding.
Gunfire could be heard clattering away in the background; from the
pattern and the way most of it was coming from one building she marked
it as a firing range.
Then she spotted the young woman who was leaning against a fence and
chatting with her friends. Nothing unusual about that, except that this
young woman had a Kalashnikov AK47 slung over her shoulder.
She ignored them and kept going, heading directly for the address SCC
was listed at. When she got to the new-looking concrete building she got
three frights.
Firstly one end was stove in where a tank had reversed into it. That was
clear because the tank had then got introduced to the business end of a
missile launcher and was still sitting in the demolished portion of
wall. There was a few children playing on the burnt out T-74.
Second there was a 'Closed' sign in the door.
And finally there was a eight or so year old girl with bright blue hair
in the yard of  a nearby house who she recognised. The kid who was with
the girl who she'd walked into who rode a motorbike with a built-in
machine gun.
At that point she spotted the three red dots sliding across the door she
was still standing beside. Three young women stepped out of a gate
across the street; two had AK47's in their hands while the third carried
nothing more than a bo staff. Yukiko knew exactly what she was looking
at; a Joketsuzo Amazon elder and two flunkies. The ones with the AK's
were extremely dangerous. The one with the staff... it didn't bear
thinking about.
"Stay exactly where you are if you want to live, demon hunter."
"Oh fuck."

***********************************

Ukyo woke up with a start and frantically grabbed at the steering wheel,
slamming his foot on where the brake pedal should be as he did so
Neither control was present. He blinked repeatedly then realised he was
looking at the passengers side dashboard.
"What the hell? Yukiko?"
The keys were still in the Land-Rover's ignition; a note was taped to
the steering wheel.
'If you wake up I've gone to scout out the Saotome's address. I'll be
back by half past ten - Yukiko.'
Ukyo looked at the clock. It was quarter to eleven, and Yukiko was one
of those people you can set your clock by.
"Shit, Yukiko. What have you gone and got yourself into this time?"
Ukyo slid across into the drivers seat, fired the 4x4's beefy diesel
engine and headed for a certain suburb.

***********************************

"Hang on, hang on, hang on. I'm here looking for a couple of people who
owe my brother a debt of honour, OK?"
Nabiki snorted. "Face it, lady. You're outta your depth. Bet you didn't
expect us nutball shapeshifters to have access to T-74 tanks, did you?"
Mi Soon rolled her eyes. "Calm down, Nabiki. We've established she's not
from the psychotic Guild, so why are you getting so worked up?"
"Because I've already lost too much for one lifetime, you old bat! Dad,
Ranma, Ranko, Mortise, Ryoga, Mum - gone. Akane's going, I heard what
you said about that Shi-Shi whatsity thing."
"Akane's a tough girl. She'll make it."
"Yeah right! You said everyone else who ever used that attack committed
suicide!"
"The fact she hasn't killed herself yet makes me for one think she
won't. All four others died within two hours... plus there's the fact
it's extremely hard for a werewolf to kill herself."
"Whoopie snot. We both know what complete psychopaths demon hunters
are."
"Nabiki, you're thinking about as clearly as Akira ever did. Stop trying
to pick fights you need your Hind D to win."
"When dealing with humans I happen to trust Mr. Sub-Machine Gun.
Werewolves and vampires can survive an MP5 clip in the face. Humans
can't."
Mi Soon sighed. "Let's put it another way. Unless you stop being a twit
I'll punch your lights out."
Nabiki glared at her. "Well don't blame me when we find aconite in the
Weetabix." She turned and stormed off.
Mi Soon rolled her eyes and turned back to Yukiko.
"Alright. Exactly what do you want with us? I'll have you know we're
allied to JGSDF 604 Special Operations Group and Clan Saotome."
"It's my brother's fight. He owes a pair of Saotomes one hell of a
kicking."
"Please remember that we - as in the Tendo bloodline and the Reformist
Joketsuzo Amazons - are inextricably involved with Clan Saotome."
"So the Saotome's and Joketsuzoku finally settled it? We're looking for
a werebear named Genma Saotome and his son Ranma Saotome."
"You are? Well, Genma Saotome is presently comatose due to injuries
suffured during a recent battle and Lord Ranma is presently MPG."
"You what? MPG? Lord?"
"Missing presumed gone. We don't think he's dead but we don't know where
the hell he is and I for one don't think he's presently in this
universe. And - unless we find a corpse when we find him - he is the
present Lord Packmaster of Clan Saotome since the previous Lord
Packmaster Akira Saotome died on the toothsome end of Genma two weeks
ago."
Yukiko whistled. "Clan Saotome's gotten a new Packmaster? That's the
first I heard about it."
"Not surprised; you're not Red Hanovan. We know, the Record Keeper
knows, now you know. That's it."
"Hmph. Shapeshifter internal politics aren't my problem, though just
between you and me it's about time Clan Saotome got rid of that
megalomaniac Akira person."
"Akira had a lot of innocent blood on his hands; I'm sad to say since
I'm Akira's sister but poor Genma did the world a service."
"I suspect a lot of people'd share that - oh SHIT."
The 'Oh Shit' came as a certain decrepit Land-Rover rounded the corner.
What Ukyo Kounji saw as his Landrover rounded the corner of the street
near the Saotome-Tendo-Hibiki house was his sister facing down two blue
haired, camo clad, assault rifle - toting teenage girls.
He immediately gave the 4x4's throttle pedal a hefty stomp.
Yukiko broke for cover the instant Ukyo's Land-Rover lurched and started
rapidly gaining speed, it's knobbly tyres screaming as he engaged the
four wheel drive and floored the throttle.
The nearest piece of hard cover was the wrecked tank. She did an
exquisite backflip, scooping her Mini-Uzi off the ground as her hands
touched down then sprang in a ki-fuelled jump onto the damaged tank
turret. The hatches had been flung open when the crew baled out; inside
it was burnt and blackened. She could smell burnt meat. The way she
landed was flat on her back on the floor.
There was a scorched JGSDF tanker's boot near her face. She nearly puked
when she realised there was still a foot in it.
Ukyo saw where Yukiko dived to; he stomped on the brakes, skidding the
4x4 to a halt beside the wrecked tank.
"Sis! Get in quick!"
The drivers door window exploded inwards and someone grabbed his hair
and yanked him out, threw him on the ground and rammed an AK47 against
the back of his skull. The other AK-armed Amazon jumped onto the tank
turret and pulled a grenade out of her back pocket.
"Lose your gun and get outta there or I'm gonna give you an HE-Frag
present."
Yukiko's shaky voice came out of the wreck.
"It's okay, I'm coming."
She gingerly lifted herself out of the turret and offered the Uzi to the
woman, butt first.
"Ukyo, you're a goddamn idiot. I'd nearly talked them down when you had
to show up and wreck an hour's work."
"Put the gun on the turret deck, demon hunter. And keep your hands where
I can see them."
"This guy's packing a pair of Glock 17's. What the hell, they're loaded
with those multirole slugs Magus Kirth uses... he hasn't got a Guild
bracelet."
Yukiko let out a frightened moan. "Oh hell, Ukyo... why'd you ever get
involved in this? Don't hurt him... please? He's a civilian, I'm the
demon hunter, if you want to shoot either of us it's me."
Ukyo spat out his mouthful of dirt. "Stop trying to be some sort of damn
hero, sis. We're in this together, remember?"
"Shut up, jackass! I'm trying to save your fucking life here!"
Mi Soon snorted. "Cool down, Kounji. We are members of a civilised
military, we do not needlessly slaughter innocent people. And if ordered
to we would take up our guns and swords and overthrow whatever despotic
regime had given the orders. We are after all supposed to be the 'bad'
shapeshifters."
Yukiko gave her a blank look. "Huh? Shouldn't that be-"
"Clan Saotome are the bad shapeshifters. Clan Hakkenan are the *worse*
shapeshifters. I'm sure that given the choice you'd prefer the lesser of
two evils, in other words us."

***********************************

Nabiki kickstarted her bike; the traverse twin rattled into life. A
grunt and two slight trails of bluish smoke beside her announced that
she wasn't the only biker still resident at the Saotome-Tendo-Hibiki
home.
Lime grinned cockily at her. "Hey, Nabs! Let's Rock!"
The snarl from Lime's Rover engined bike completely drowning out
Nabiki's CB500.
Nabiki smirked and flipped the switch that engaged the turbo. Ranma had
somehow arranged it to be switchable, an engineering trick that was
completely past Nabiki's range of mechanical knowledge. The turbo spun
up and started sucking air in with a growing whine, audible even over
the growl from the Rover straight six.
They zoomed out of the driveway, spitting twin lines of blue smoke from
their bike's tyres.
Mi Soon watched them go. She snorted and turned back to her book.

***********************************

Nabiki smirked to herself. Despite having an eighth of the engine
capacity she was keeping ahead of Lime with ease.
The two ratbikes zoomed onto the high street. Then Nabiki saw something
- or rather someone - that made her jam the brakes on.
A teenage girl with long red hair tied back in a ponytail and the front
roughly cropped off. Dressed in a battered black leather jacket with an
eight pointed star of chaos on the back, mirrorshades and flared denim
jeans. Walking with a slight but noticeable limp.
"Ranko! It is you, isn't it?"
The redhead removed her sunglasses, revealing that right enough her eyes
were red. "Do I know you?"
"It's me, Nabiki, you twat!"
Ranko shook her head. "I... I don't remember."
"Shit, Ranko! What's wrong with you?"
"I CAN'T REMEMBER A DAMN THING, OK? I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO THE HELL I
AM!"

***********************************

"Interesting."
Nabiki glared at Mi Soon. "Is that all you can say?"
"Oh, it's just that I've never even heard of a vampire getting amnesia
before."
Ranko goggled. "Hold on, back a bit. Vampire?"
"You mean you've even forgotten what you are? Sweet Dana, you ki's low."
Mi Soon glanced back at Nabiki. "I figure she hasn't fed in the last two
weeks."
Nabiki nodded. "Figures."
"Well, we'd better give her some blood before she dusts."
"Blood?"
"You're a vampire, kid. You need to ingest ki on a regular basis or
you'll collapse into a pile of dust. It's lucky Nabiki and Lime found
you when they did - you've got approximately enough ki to last you
another six to eight hours. You may be wondering why blood. Well, it's
the simplest source of ki."
"This is just too fuckin' weird."
"You don't know the half of it. Your family are werewolves and your
mother is a demon hunter. Your boyfriend is also a vampire. I too am a
werewolf."
"Bullshit."
Mi Soon proved her point by the simple expedient of shapeshifting.

***********************************

The remaining family were sat round the table trying to digest the news.
Kasumi kept muttering 'Wow, man..." to herself.  Mi Soon looked smug.
Happosai carefully examined Ranko and started mumbling about
experiments. Akane just sat and stared at the floor.
It was shaping up to be a completely typical evening.
Nabiki went crosseyed. She'd had enough.
"STOP THE GODDAMN MOPING!"
There was a dead silence. Everyone was staring at her like she had just
grown a third arm.
She whirled and grabbed Akane by the choker. "So Ranma got himself blown
to God-knows-where. You heard Honda as well as I did, there wasn't
enough power in that goddamn explosion to vaporise much of anything, let
anone three fucking people, HE IS GOING TO BE BACK! So Shampoo got put
in a coma. IT'S ONLY A MATTER OF FUCKING TIME BEFORE SHE COMES OUT OF
IT! You were there when Mi Soon told us that! OPEN YOUR FUCKING EARS!
YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO FUCKING LOST SOMEONE! We've all been through
it, remember? You ain't the only one who loves Ranma, we all miss that
crazy sonofabitch... Jesus fucking wept, I am OUT of here. I've had
enough of this bullshit, I'm going to go polish my helicopter or
something. Let me know when you CUT THE GODDAMN CRAP!"
She turned and stormed out to where her Hind D was parked. Mao Xing was
fiddling with it's engines again.
Nabiki glared at the Chinese boy.
"Prep her, I'm going to go unwind. Someone tell Honda so the JASDF don't
crap themselves."
"Nabiki..."
Nabiki turned and glared at Akane, who had chosen that moment to walk
outside. The glare was pretty pointless since Akane couldn't see it.
"What now?"
Akane shot a sad little smile in the direction Nabiki's voice was coming
from.
"Thanks... I needed that."

The Great Dameramu would like to point out that this chapter is
complete.

NOTES
Next - Another reappearance, an awakening, an extremely smug Happosai
and somebody getting very pissed off indeed...
Laters,
Calum 'Doghead' Wallace.

GLOSSARY OF TERMS
Alternator - Higher tech version of a generator.

Artic - The UK term for a semi truck. Short for 'articulated lorry'.

Binned - crashed. Normally means written off. Derived from 'bin' as in
'rubbish bin' (the British term for a trash can)

Chain lube - Motorbike chain lubrication oil. Comes in a spray can and
looks a bit like snot.

Conrod (connecting rod) - The bit of metal that connects the piston to
the crankshaft. Shaped approximately like a flat dumbbell.

Engine clicking - An internal combustion engine heats up when run. Run
it hard and it heats up more, then when you switch off the engine will
start emitting a series of sharp clicks as the metal cools and
contracts.

Final drive - the drive chain that goes from the gearbox to the back
wheel and the cogs (final drive sprockets) that it runs on. Not to be
confused with the primary drive - the chain/sprocket or belt/pulleys
between the engine and gearbox.

Gasflowing - trimming off excess metal from inside the cylinder heads to
aid the burn rate of fuel within the engine. Gives a small horsepower
boost.

Gixer - Slang for a Suzuki GSXR (one of the craziest bikes they make).

Header tank - Tank that contains the spare water for the radiator on a
sealed cooling system as found in most cars and some high performance
bikes.

Honda CG125 - Small single - cylinder 4-stroke road bike. Not very much
of anything but supremely reliable and dirt cheap. It's reliability
stems from having very little to go wrong and a low - revving 4-stroke
engine.

Honda 250 Superdream - CB250. The next up the Honda model range from the
CG125 and just a bigger version of the same.

Honda 500 Superdream - CB500. A CB250 with a bigger bore and heavier
frame.

Honda Fireblade - Insane Honda sportsbike. Mad but beginning to show
it's age.

Kill switch - The engine's 'off' switch. Turns off power to the
ignition.

Lid / skidlid - Slang for a crash helmet.

Nitrous oxide - Laughing gas. A petrol - nitrous mix burns faster than a
petrol - air mix therefore produces more horsepower and more wear in the
engine.

Ratbike - A motorbike made to look as fucked up and unroadworthy as
possible while still being street legal. Normally painted flat black.

Steering damper - a long, thin shock absorber that fits between the
forks and the frame. Helps steady the steering. A steering damper is
essential for disabled bikers who have lost the use of one arm as
without it there's no way you'd be able to steer at low speed or pull
away one armed.

Stocker - unmodified factory-built vehicle; I think this comes from the
term 'sales stock'.

Supercharger - A pump driven off the crank that forces more air into the
engine thus forcing it to run faster.

Toby - An Inverness Collegeism; slang meaning something along the lines
of widget, gizmo or thingy. Derived from angling parlarance (toby = a
small wooden fish used as a lure.) May be related to the epithet 'Toby
Tishbein' and can be said 'Tobyracho' for no apparent reason. (I'm not
making this up! Honest!)

Top yoke - The yokes are two pieces of metal that hold the front forks
together and  to the bike. The top yoke is the upper one. Known as
triple clamps in the US.

JASDF - Japanese Air Self Defence Force. The Japanese air force.

JGSDF - Japanese Ground Self Defence Force. The ground forces arm of the
Japanese military.

JSDF - Japanese Self Defence Force. The collective Japanese armed
forces.

What likes - Slack Scottish grammar. Means something along the lines of
'please could you explain that'. Only considerably less posh.

Wheelie bin - a square green plastic trashcan about the size of a normal
bin, with a flip top and two wheels.

------------------------------

From: "Doghead Thirteen" <wolfman@gehenna.fsnet.co.uk>
Subject: [Ranma][FanFic] Biker 1/2 book 02 chapter 03
X-Original-Date: Sun, 22 Sep 2002 05:15:03 +0100

LEGALISTIC SHIT and RANT
Please give up on your completely unfounded accusations.

It's working. It's working. My writer's block seems to have taken a
hike. I just hope it keeps f*cking working...

Words in "{this}" kind of brackets are spoken in Cantonese. Those in
"[this]" are in wolf-speak.

Biker 1/2 Cycle 1 - Birth of a Modern Legend, book 2: Severed.

Chapter 3: Dream of mirrors
"Knife cuts through her skin, and your heart starts beating faster. You
feel the pressure within, as you look into her eyes" - Apoptygma
Berzerk, 'Deep Red'

"It didn't get any better when I woke up." - Xian Pu.

***********************************

The scream of gas turbine engines accompanied by the clatter of six
massive rotor blades sweeping through the air had become a familiar
noise nuisance in Nerima over the last two weeks.
Su giggled as the heavily armed camo-painted monster eased off the
ground. She had been terrified of the Hind D at first but quickly became
addicted to flying when Nabiki finally managed to persuade her into the
aircraft.
Nabiki grinned and shoved the throttle wide open.

***********************************

The purple-haired girl grimaced at the racket. A roaring, whistling
scream and rattle. She was sure she'd heard that noise before, but
couldn't find it's source.
The sound grew to an almost painful level before fading into the
distance as she peered around the filthy bog she found herself in.
She felt for her katana, but the blade was missing from it's customary
place at her side.
"Hello, Xian Pu."
She glanced round at the source of the voice. Her exact double stood
grinning at her.
"Who the hell are you?"
The other girl snorted at that. "I'm something your subconscious has
dreamed up to represent itself. This is after all a coma dream."
"You what?"
"You're unconscious, Xian Pu. Get used to it."
Shampoo looked around. "Okay, how the hell do I get out of here?"
"By waking up. Unfortunately that's like saying you can become immortal
by the simple expedient of forgetting to die. True but easier said than
done."
"You're not helping."
"You're on your own for this one."
The roaring sound returned; Shampoo glanced around.
"That's a Hind if ever I heard one."
She made up her mind and started walking towards where she could hear
the chopper from. The girl who claimed to be her subconscious followed
her.
"Okay, so what's all this slime about? My doubts or something?"
"What, you mean you don't remember the swamp outside Joketsuzo?"
"Oh yeah." Shampoo shuddered. The day she wandered into that self-same
swamp was one of the worst moments of her life. The helicopter sounds
were coming from where the village should be.
Shampoo smirked, grabbed a suitable lump of wood and started carefully
probing her way through the filthy bog.
"Look out world, I'm comin' home."
"As Ranma would put it."
"Shut up."

***********************************

"I assume Xian Pu's condition remains the same?"
Mao Xing nodded. "Hello, Mi Soon. No change... you early today."
John Kirth stepped into the room. "Yes, she's early and with good
reason."
"Huh?"
"Have another look at that electroencaphelograph, kid."
"Huh? Her brain activity-"
"Your sister is now in normal REM sleep."
Mao Xing stood up and headed for the door.
"I go tell Akane."

***********************************

"Exactly why are you trying to protect those fucking bastards Genma and
Ranma Saotome? You seem like a pleasent enough person."
Kasumi shot him a nasty look. "Like, cut the shit, man. Genma's a like,
hero and Ranma's kinda gonna be like, back, man."
"I'd advise you don't pray for the return of that little cretin Ranma.
It wouldn't be pretty if I got my hands on him."
"Blow it outta your like, ass, man. You'd have to kill every one of us
to get him. And we've all got like, 7.62 magic wands, man. You like,
fuck with Ranma and Genma and you kinda fuck with the lot of us, dig?
Now please be so like, kind as to *fuck off*."
"If that little shit Ranma comes back I'll find out, you hear me? He
can't hide from Ukyo Kounji!"
The door crashed open and Akane lurched through it, bouncing off the
doorframe as she passed. She had a Kalashnikov AK47 in each hand.
"Get the fuck out of my house, you worthless piece of shit!"
Ukyo stared at her. She had a bandage over one eye and was quite
obviously blind in the other - her pupil was grey and misty looking. She
glared sightlessly in his general direction and clumsily slid the gun's
safety catches to full auto.
Ukyo gulped. This scarfaced assault rifle toting person was blatantly as
mad as hell and ready to use those AK's even if she couldn't see where
the hell she was shooting. He grabbed Yukiko's arm.
"Let's get the hell *out*."
The door behind them crashed open.
"Akane! Xian Pu be waking up... am I catch you at bad time?"
The AK47's made a harsh metallic clatter as they hit the floor. Akane
let out an inarticulate moan. "Uahhhhh! Shampoo! Where is she?"
"You come with I, no?"
Akane seemed to go inactive and let Mao Xing lead her away.
Ukyo stared after her then glanced at Kasumi.
"What the hell was that about?"
Kasumi shot him another withering (if stoned) glare.
"Her girlfriend, fuckface. Shampoo's been in a like, coma for two weeks,
since before my little sister was like, blinded. Now fuck off."
"I know when I'm not wanted."
Ukyo gestured Yukiko to follow him as he headed out to his Land Rover.

***********************************

"Aye, it be a grand year fer taters."
Farmer Jones nodded his agreement. "Oo arr, that it do be. Though yon
cabbage don't be doing so good."
The two men were interrupted by the sound of a jet aircraft approaching
the nearby humpback bridge accompanied by a doppler scream of
"KUUUSSSO!"
A sixty foot fireball shot between the two men, the machine that was
causing it splattering them with mud and stray dung.
Farmer Murphy wiped the cow shit out of his beard and shook his head.
"Well bugger Oi down flat, they RAF be worse every year."

***********************************

Ryoga Hibiki gritted her teeth as the jetbike's wheels smashed back into
the ground. A humpback bridge on a motorway, leading directly to a
field? What the hell were those goddamn stupid Taiwanese playing at?
She swore as the jetbike's wheels nearly flew out of under her on the
cow shit saturated ground. There was a thud as the wheels found tarmac
again. A roadsign streaked past - a Japanese roadsign.
Maybe she wasn't in Taiwan after all.

***********************************

Lime's head snapped up from where he had been dozing in the sun at the
distinctive sound of a Rolls-Royce Allison gas turbine engine with added
afterburners and a wheel bolted to each end careering down the street at
Very High Speed (TM). He jumped to his feet with a yell.
"RYOGA!"
The speed mad and thoroughly lost transsexual catgirl in question
spotted the very broad form of one of her closest friends immediately;
she slammed on the brakes and let go of the throttle, bringing the
jetbike to a tyre-screaming, smoke belching halt beside him.
"Ryoga! I thought you were dead!"
"Who, me? Nah, you can't keep a good Hibiki down, man. Where's Herb?
Where's Mint? More to the point, where the fuck's Ranma?"
"Oh shit, you don't know."
Ryoga killed her bike's engine. "Don't know WHAT? Smack it to me, man."
"Ranma, Prince Herb and Mr. Tendo are all missing. Mint's dead, so's
Lord Saotome, so's Mr. Mortise. Mrs. Saotome's in the hospital, Xian Pu
and Genma are comatose, and Akane's in a bad way."
Ryoga dumped her lid. "What? Dad's gonna be alright ain't he? C'mon,
man, Dad ain't gonna die or somethin'!"
"I'm sorry, Ryoga. It's hard telling you, but..." Lime stopped and shook
his head.
"Genma's breathing through a hole in his chest you could fit your hand
through right now... he's in a real mess."
"Is Ranko okay?"
"Your sister's pretty messed up, she lost her memory in the battle."
"Crap. I gotta go see Ranma's mum... I'm all she's got left."
"Hang on a tick, I'll get my bike and show you the way, right?"
Ryoga stared uncomfortably at the ground.
"Yeah. You do that."

***********************************

"Mrs. Saotome, you have some visitors."
Nodoka looked up from the laptop Nabiki had leant her, hoping against
hope to see one of her children. Mi Soon had dropped in and told her
about Ranko's reappearance, but so far her vampire daughter hadn't come
to see her.
Instead she got a close second best as a certain young woman dressed in
tatty black motorbike leathers and a tight crop-top strode purposefully
through the door, accompanied by an exceedingly broad young man she
remembered seeing in the company of that Prince Herb character.
"Ryoga?"
"Hi, Nodoka. Thought I'd bring you this."
Ryoga casually handed over her katana. The Hibiki girl had obviously
spent some time cleaning the weapon - last time Nodoka had seen it it
was caked with blood and vampire dust.
Ryoga glared at her for a second.
"I know we never really gotten on, but you get well soon, huh? Ranko
needs you even if she doesn't remember anything much, you're her mother.
Dad's gonna be okay, he's real tough. And Ranma WILL be back. It's gonna
happen, then he'll straighten everything out the way he always does.
Things are gonna get a lot better round here and you better believe it.
Oh, and I brought this."
Ryoga handed her a set of keys. Taking pride of place on the keyring was
a large plain steel Kenworth ignition key.
"You're gonna be back behind the wheel of your rig, Nodoka. Mao Xing and
Moose have been fixing it up where it gotten bashed around in the
battle."
Nodoka stared at the ignition key for a moment then grinned at the stern
faced catgirl.
"Come here and give me a hug, Ryoga Hibiki."
Much to the surprise of both of them Ryoga didn't hesitate to.

***********************************

Shampoo swept a satisfied look around the village square. It wasn't
quite how she remembered it, but it would do. The helicopter noise had
faded out but now she could hear a steady beeping noise and some
mumblings. They were coming from all around her as the village started
to fade.
A mess of weird shapes and colours slowly resolved into a scarred face,
bandages wrapped over one eye and the other grey and sightlessly staring
at her. The tickling resolved into a dull pain at the back of her head
and somebody running their fingertips across her face. Her eyes were
full of crud.
She attempted to speak but all that would come out was a groan. Then she
recognised the owner of the scarred and bandaged face.
"Uhhhaaakane?"
Akane burst into tears.

***********************************

"Mrs. Saotome, there's something I've been meaning to talk to you about.
You too, Ryoga."
Nodoka wagged a finger at Lime. "Oh for goodness sake, call me Nodoka.
Being called 'Mrs. Saotome' makes me feel like someone's grandmother."
"Um... okay... well, it's just I've gotten a hunch where Prince Herb and
Ranma are. And I normally get good hunches."
"Where?"
"To tell you that, there's a book I need."
Ryoga elbowed him in the ribs. "Okay, arsemaster. Where's this book at?"
"Back home, in our Grand Library."
"Then what the fuck you waiting for, man? Let's roll 'em!" Ryoga smacked
her fist into her open palm. "We gotta get Ranma back, and fucking fast.
If I know Akane she'll be going to fucking *bits* back there, man! Why
didn't you tell Mi Soon, you twat?"
"Well... actually, because Prince Herb's father stole it from the
Joketsuzoku around two hundred years ago. I thought she might still be
pissed about that."
"You dickhead! So what the fuck some dead guy nicked it, let's get ready
to roll out! Places to go, people to fuck up! I'll be back, Nodoka. And
I'll have this damn book with me when I come!"
Ryoga turned and strode out the room, a rather worried looking Lime hard
behind her. She fished a cigarette out of her pocket as they cleared the
hospital doors.
"Okay, man. Lead on, I'll be hard behind you."
"I gotta get some juice and we'd better tell Nabiki, let the usual
suspects know you're back before we do a bunk."
"Yeah whatever you fat bastard, just get your goddamn ass into gear,
OK?"
"Shit, Ryoga! There's no need to blow your-"
"GODDAMNIT, LIME YA FUCKHEAD! Look, I just found out my dad's half-dead
and you expect me to be fucking CALM?!?!" She put the startled Chinese
boy down. "I want my dad out the hospital and my little brother back
from wherever the hell he's got to, okay? And I want Herb back. Those
guys are about all I give a flying fuck about, and knowing they're stuck
fuck-knows-where HURTS. Get it?"
Lime nodded. "I do, Ryoga. You think I ain't worried about Prince Herb?
You think I ain't hurting about Mint? This shit is bad, Ryoga. Real bad.
I want to find those filth who killed my brother, and when I find them
they are going to suffer..."
"You and me both, Lime. Mint was a pro."
Lime blinked. He knew that was the highest compliment Ryoga ever paid
anyone.
"Let's get the hell out of here before I strangle someone."

***********************************

Akane was still crying when the distinctive howl of that jetbike
interrupted all sound within the building. Tyres screamed as the bikes
ground to a halt.
Akane's head snapped up. "Ryoga?
Mi Soon got to her feet. "Well I'll be a-"
The door nearly flew off it's hinges. Ryoga stormed into the room.
"So there you are you old- Holy crap, what happened to your face, Akane?
You look like you lost a headbutting contest with a bulldozer!"
Akane winced. "I got a closeup of a hand grenade."
"Sucks. Look, Lime figures he knows how to find out how to get Herb and
Ranma back. The fat fuck say's there's this book lurking in the Musk
fortress or whatever they've gotten that some dead guy nicked off the
Amazons a couple of hundred years ago and he figures it'll have what's
needed to get them back. We're going across there right fucking now and
nobody's gonna blow their goddamn lid about past fucking history, OK?"

***********************************

The  Land-Rover juddered violently as it rattled over a railway
crossing. Both Ukyo and Yukiko had been very quiet since leaving Nerima.
They were thirty miles out before Ukyo finally spoke.
"Fuck."
"If you ask me we're lucky, Ukyo. We were going to mess with the biggest
shapeshifter clan on the planet, something that was bound to come back
and haunt us. I'm just worried about what Ranma's going to do if they
find him and what Genma's going to do when he comes out of that coma."
"If he comes back I'll be waiting for him and he'll wish he hadn't. I'm
going to get a place in Nerima and wait for the bastard."
"You're cracked. I figure there's nearly a thousand heavily armed Amerai
in that one district of Tokyo. And you saw the goddamn helicopter
gunship they've got sitting there. Like, Jesus Christ! Those Hinds have
as much firepower as half a tank platoon! You saw the news reports -
they had a raging gun battle down there. That wrecked tank was one of
theirs. They're in with the Self-Defence Force."
"I'll challenge Ranma to a duel."
"You are so naive! That only works in cheesy-chunk movies! Real people
fight dirty. Real people get their mates involved. I checked the
registrar of births, marriages and deaths. That blind girl's his wife,
and by the bulge forming in her middle she's pregnant. The guy's going
to be a father, he's got every reason to want to survive. So he'll gang
up on you with his mates, either that or shoot you."
"I'll decide what to do when the time comes. But I will be waiting for
that fucking bastard and I *will* get even with his sorry ass."
There was a roar of engines, the howl of a jet and a pair of black
motorbikes swept past the landrover, buffeting it with the wind of their
passage and nearly singing it with the massive fireball that was blowing
out of the rearmost bike's exhausts. Ukyo winced.
"Jesus, they're fairly shifting. I mean, we're doing 89... they must be
breaking the ton fifty mark!"
"I recognise that jet bike... it was in the SCC advert Dad spotted."
"One of Genma Saotome's bikes?"
"No. Ranma built it from scrapyard components... I gotta hand it to him,
he knows how to make a damn nice bike." Yukiko snorted. "If we don't end
up at war with them I think I'll get him to build me a crosser."
"I never really liked bikes."
"Bullshit, you loved Ranma's Gixer back when we were little kids. Don't
damn the machine because the rider's a shithead."

***********************************

Happosai strutted into the front porch of Mi Soon's house. The old woman
grinned at her lecherous son.
"Hello, boyo. You're looking smug today."
"I have every right to look smug! More to the point, I look like a cat
that has not so much got the cream as got the entire dairy herd!"
"That sounds thoroughly self-satisfied. So what brought that on?"
"Mum, after all these years... I FINALLY SCORED!"
Mi Soon burst out laughing. "You never do change, do you?"
"Why the hell would I want to change? I'm perfectly happy the way I am!
Damn, there's some foxy ladies go to that rock club! Look out world,
Happosai Saotome has discovered INDUSTRIAL!"
He suddenly and inexplicably started moshing. After he had headbanged to
inaudible speed metal for a few moments Mi Soon shooed him out the door.
"Go and hang out with Kasumi and Mu Tze, they're having an SPF1000
marathon."
"Rocking!"
Mi Soon watched him go. She shook her head.
"Well, it's about time that silly boy spent some time being young."

***********************************

Happosai homed in on the blare of industrial heavy metal music with a
wide grin on his face. He had excellent hearing and had caught what his
mother said just after he left the building. Musing on it he realised it
was true - he had gone straight from adolescent boy to disenchanted old
man without bothering with all that stuff in between.
He grinned. Time to make up for lost time.

***********************************

Thirty miles to the north it was pissing it down.
Rain lashed on the windscreen of Yamazaki's supercharged Mack
Freightmaster as the massive truck barrelled down the expressway. The
skinny Amerai trucker popped another cigarette into his mouth and
snapped his fingers, summoning a flash of fire to light up.
His hand dropped back to the gearshift and he changed up a gear as the
truck hit the sixteen mile downgrade into Tokyo from the north.
Yamazaki was worried. He hadn't heard from Nodoka since Amachi went and
got himself killed by that Kalashnikov-wielding psychotic Chinese
werewolf truck thief. Yamazaki was fully aware how much the hot-rodder
had meant to Nodoka. Add to that the rumours that were flying around
about raging gun battles in the Nerima suburbs, JGSDF mobilisations,
black helicopters and Amerai openly showing their nature off and you had
a situation which bore the label 'deep shit.'
So he was really worried. After all, what self-respecting werefox didn't
know who a Moroboshi was? All the signs pointed to supernatural
involvement in the developing Nerima situation, especially since Colonel
Eichii Honda was reputed to be involved in whatever the hell was going
on there. And that would mean Nodoka was definitely up to the eyeballs
in it.
Kenji Yamazaki had already been disowned by his family, divorced his
wife and lost all contact with his daughter. He didn't want to loose his
best friend as well.
He fished his crop-off AK47 out of the glove compartment and tucked it
down the back of his belt then reached down behind the driver's seat
with his left hand while keeping the rig on an even keel with his right
and extracted a razor sharp tanto which seemed to glitter with some
malevolent life of it's own.
"Hang on in there, Butch. Yama's comin'..."

And that's another one done with.

NOTES
Next - Yama getting a little upset and what happens with Ryoga's
quest...
Laters,
Calum 'Doghead' Wallace.

GLOSSARY OF TERMS
Alternator - Higher tech version of a generator.

Artic - The UK term for a semi truck. Short for 'articulated lorry'.

Binned - crashed. Normally means written off. Derived from 'bin' as in
'rubbish bin' (the British term for a trash can)

Chain lube - Motorbike chain lubrication oil. Comes in a spray can and
looks a bit like snot.

Conrod (connecting rod) - The bit of metal that connects the piston to
the crankshaft. Shaped approximately like a flat dumbbell.

Engine clicking - An internal combustion engine heats up when run. Run
it hard and it heats up more, then when you switch off the engine will
start emitting a series of sharp clicks as the metal cools and
contracts.

Final drive - the drive chain that goes from the gearbox to the back
wheel and the cogs (final drive sprockets) that it runs on. Not to be
confused with the primary drive - the chain/sprocket or belt/pulleys
between the engine and gearbox.

Gasflowing - trimming off excess metal from inside the cylinder heads to
aid the burn rate of fuel within the engine. Gives a small horsepower
boost.

Gixer - Slang for a Suzuki GSXR (one of the craziest bikes they make).

Header tank - Tank that contains the spare water for the radiator on a
sealed cooling system as found in most cars and some high performance
bikes.

Honda CG125 - Small single - cylinder 4-stroke road bike. Not very much
of anything but supremely reliable and dirt cheap. It's reliability
stems from having very little to go wrong and a low - revving 4-stroke
engine.

Honda 250 Superdream - CB250. The next up the Honda model range from the
CG125 and just a bigger version of the same.

Honda 500 Superdream - CB500. A CB250 with a bigger bore and heavier
frame.

Honda Fireblade - Insane Honda sportsbike. Mad but beginning to show
it's age.

Kill switch - The engine's 'off' switch. Turns off power to the
ignition.

Kuso - As far as I know this is the Japanese translation of the word
'Shit'.

Lid / skidlid - Slang for a crash helmet.

Nitrous oxide - Laughing gas. A petrol - nitrous mix burns faster than a
petrol - air mix therefore produces more horsepower and more wear in the
engine.

Ratbike - A motorbike made to look as fucked up and unroadworthy as
possible while still being street legal. Normally painted flat black.

Steering damper - a long, thin shock absorber that fits between the
forks and the frame. Helps steady the steering. A steering damper is
essential for disabled bikers who have lost the use of one arm as
without it there's no way you'd be able to steer at low speed or pull
away one armed.

Stocker - unmodified factory-built vehicle; I think this comes from the
term 'sales stock'.

Supercharger - A pump driven off the crank that forces more air into the
engine thus forcing it to run faster.

Toby - An Inverness Collegeism; slang meaning something along the lines
of widget, gizmo or thingy. Derived from angling parlarance (toby = a
small wooden fish used as a lure.) May be related to the epithet 'Toby
Tishbein' and can be said 'Tobyracho' for no apparent reason. (I'm not
making this up! Honest!)

Top yoke - The yokes are two pieces of metal that hold the front forks
together and  to the bike. The top yoke is the upper one. Known as
triple clamps in the US.

JASDF - Japanese Air Self Defence Force. The Japanese air force.

JGSDF - Japanese Ground Self Defence Force. The ground forces arm of the
Japanese military.

JSDF - Japanese Self Defence Force. The collective Japanese armed
forces.

What likes - Slack Scottish grammar. Means something along the lines of
'please could you explain that'. Only considerably less posh.

Wheelie bin - a square green plastic trashcan about the size of a normal
bin, with a flip top and two wheels.

------------------------------

From: "Doghead Thirteen" <wolfman@gehenna.fsnet.co.uk>
Subject: [Ranma][FanFic] Biker 1/2 book 02 chapter 04
X-Original-Date: Sun, 22 Sep 2002 05:15:49 +0100

LEGALISTIC SHIT and RANT
What, me? Naah, would I do something like that? Well, maybe I would, but
I didn't.

Looks like I'm on a roll here.

Words in "{this}" kind of brackets are spoken in Cantonese. Those in
"[this]" are in wolf-speak.

Biker 1/2 Cycle 1 - Birth of a Modern Legend, book 2: Severed.

Chapter 4: Hope returns.
"Forever in your eyes you see forever in my heart, my love for you will
make us both climb higher. Driven by the power that is burning in my
heart, I know my faith in you will keep us together." - Apoptygma
Berzerk, 'Love Never Dies'

"What the fuck kinda question is that, you moron? Of course I hadta do
my damnedest to get Ranma back! First, he's my favourite and only
brother. Second, he's family. Third, Akane was hurtin'. I don't *ever*
let my friends down." - Ryoga Hibiki, interview for 'The Independent'
21/7/2005.

***********************************

Nabiki Tendo was busy showing something very important to Ranko.
"Yeah... they do look familiar, but I'm not sure why."
Nabiki groaned. "Ranko, the old WD '45 is yours, that's why it's
familiar. The Evo is your boyfriend's bike."
Ranko examined the aging Second World War American army bike that was
propped against the wall due to it's sidestand having rusted solid and
it's centre stand having dropped off.
Nabiki handed her a set of ignition keys.
"Ranko, I know exactly what you need. Get on that bike and go thrash it
round town, OK? You'll feel better after that."
Ranko nodded, took the keys and sat down in the saddle of the battered
black H-D. She smiled.
"I think you might be right."

***********************************

The black Harley chugged down the street, a slight trail of bluish-black
smoke issuing from one exhaust. Ranko had a quiet smile on her face; she
had no idea how she knew how to ride, but it felt right.
There was a massive roar and a pair of bikes - one black, one
tiger-striped - appeared beside her. Both of them also looked vaguely
familiar, especially the black bike. It was a jet engine with two
wheels.
Ryoga glanced across and shot Ranko a 'thumbs up'. She gunned the
jetbike up and swept past her half-sister, hard behind Lime.
She let out an exultant whoop and punched one fist into the air.
"YEEEEEEEEEEEEE-HA!"
Ranko gassed her hog and went after them.
The trio of very different ratbikes skidded to a halt outside Dr. Tofu's
clinic. Lime grabbed his saddlebag and nodded at Ryoga.
"Okay. We tell Mrs. Saotome, then we get the hell over to Mi Soon's
place and get your brother and Mr. Herb the hell back where they
belong."
Ryoga grinned at Ranko.
"S'okay, sis. We're gonna get Ranma back from wherever the hell those
goddamn cunts sent him and then everything's gonna be okay."
The three of them walked into the clinic.
"Yo! Doc! Visitors for Nodoka!"
"Hello, Ryoga isn't it? And this chap would be Mr. Lime, this would be
Ranko, correct?"
"Dead on, Doc. We've gotten some good news for Ranma's mum."
"Come this way, please."

***********************************

Nodoka looked up from her book as the door clumped open.
"Ryoga! Lime! You weren't away for long!"
"Of course fucking not, you don't think we were gonna waste time on this
one, do you? Lime borrowed a plane off a mate of Herb's, we flew
straight to the Musk fortress, grabbed the book and a couple of others
their mystic guy thought might come in handy and got the hell back to
where we left the bikes. Lime's a damn good pilot." She grinned. "Don't
worry, Nodoka. We're gonna have Ranma back in a couple of days at the
most. Then everything's gonna be okay, you know the way he gets stuff
straightened out. I know he ain't gonna let Akane stay blind, or your
back stay fucked."
"Don't raise my hopes prematurely, Ryoga."
"Mum, there's shit out there can turn a guy into a girl-" Ryoga stopped.
"Er-"
Nodoka stared at her. "You called me..."
"Um... well, what I was saying was - well, I usta be a guy, remember? If
there's stuff that can make a guy change into a catgirl there *has* to
be stuff that can fix your back, and Akane's eyes."
"I'm praying there is... for Akane's sake."
"Yeah well go ahead, I'm praying for Akane *and* you. Next time I see
you I'll have my brother with me, mum. Later."
Nodoka stared after the three youngsters as they left.
"... she called me Mum... twice..."

***********************************

Mi Soon was busy reading the latest Tom Clancy novel when the door
crashed open on the business end of Ryoga, who was followed by a worried
looking Lime.
"Hey, ya old bat!" Ryoga hauled a large leather-bound book out of her
pack. "Gerraloadathis!"
She casually threw it at Mi Soon, who grabbed it, stared at it for
several seconds then let out a delighted insane cackle.
"NYAHAHAHA! Excellent!"
"What you laughing for, you old goat? Get on the case!"
"Er..." Lime remarked. "Will that help?"
"My dear boy, this is one of the original Arotha Kaderaan codices,
brought from Homeworld by my parents... it is a guide to
transdimensional exploratory and tracking methods usable in this
particular branch of the multiverse. It was the only copy of such held
by our original Clan; thus my parent's choice of this fringe layer of
the multiverse."
"All of which adds up to what?"
"Bring me an artifact belonging to Ranma, one he used or wore
regularly."
"Get your ass over the Tendo's house, I ain't touching his bike without
asking."
Mi Soon blinked a few times. "His bike? Hasn't Akane spent most of her
time in contact with it since she woke up?"
"Yeah, but bro built that Gixer ten years ago and he's done nearly five
hundred thousand miles on it. Hell, that bike's nearly part of him!
Apart from the last two weeks he's ridden his bike daily for ten years.
She even smells like him."
"You have a very valid point, Ryoga. Of course, it would be easier if we
could get some of his hair."
"I'll see what I can find in his crash helmet. Only person who's ever
worn that scabby old skidlid is Ranma."
"You do that. Come, let's get ourselves over to the Tendo house."
"Mi Soon, ask Akane and Shampoo fer permission before you even lay a
finger on Ranma's bike."
"Very well, but... why?"
"It's Ranma's bike. Nobody touches someone else's bike without asking.
Since Ranma ain't here it's up to Akane and Shampoo to decide if
anyone's allowed to touch his bike since they're his chicks. Same way as
it's up to me to decide if anyone's allowed to touch Herb's bike since
he's my man."
"I don't get it."
"We're bikers. I know this shit. Take my word for it."

***********************************

Akane reflexively jerked her head up when the door crashed open; she and
Shampoo were sitting together by Ranma's bike. Shampoo was holding Akane
and trying to comfort the Japanese girl.
"Hey, girls! Have I got news for you!"
Ryoga casually dumped the book on the table; it made a nice, solid
thunk.
"There ya go. With the help of that Mi Soon's gonna get Herb, Ranma an'
Tendo back. OK, any idea where my nutball brother's skidlid's gotten
to?"
Akane nodded. "It's in our bedroom, at the foot of the bed. Well, unless
Kasumi's moved it since..." She started crying again; Shampoo shut her
eyes for a second then started murmuring quiet reassurances into Akane's
ear.
Ryoga smirked. "A-fuckin'-1! OK, Mi Soon. You get whatever kibble you
need for this together and I'll go see if I can find any of loverboy's
hair. C'mon, Lime. I don't wanna delay this by gettin' lost."
"Gotcha."
Mi Soon chuckled and shook her head. "Crazy kid."
Ryoga flipped her off. "Kiss me right under the tail, ya old bag!"
Mi Soon ignored the comment. "Kasumi, Mu Tze, come through here a
moment."
The two youths in question lurched out of the kitchen.
"Like, yeah?"
"Wow Kasumi, that's some like, good shit..."
"I like, told ya ya like, lightweight, man..."
Mi Soon blinked a few times. To say Mu Tze was stoned would be blatantly
underexaggerating it - the boy was completely smashed.
"Ah. Oh well. Ah, Kasumi. Have you got any candles I can scrounge?"
"Like, candles? Would like, white household ones do the kinda, trick?"
"Yes, they'd be fine. I need a dozen of them."
"Cool, man. I'll just go like, get them. Hey, Moose, you wanna shot of
my bong?"
"Groovy! Anyone got any chocolate? I got the like, munchies, man..."
"Wow man! Munchie buzz!"
Kasumi and Mu Tze lurched back into the kitchen. Mi Soon stifled her
laughter and pulled her dagger out of it's sheath. She placed it on the
table.
Ryoga crashed through the door, Ranma's lid hanging from one hand and a
couple of bits of long jet black hair gripped between the thumb and
forefinger of the other hand. "Yer in luck, I got these outta it.
They're too long to be Akane's an' not long enough to be mine."
"Huh?"
"Aw, c'mon. You never seen Ranma with his hair outta the ponytail? It's
down to his waist. Mine's about six inches longer, Akane's is about six
inch shorter. Hers looks longer than his because she wears it loose and
she's a load shorter. Everyone else in the place with black hair has way
shorter hair."
Mi Soon took the pieces of hair, shapeshifted, sniffed them and nodded.
"They smell of him... Nabiki, are you alright?"
Nabiki Tendo started to say something, shook her head and stared at the
floor.
"Get Ranma back where he belongs... quickly... please?"

***********************************

Ryoga was pretty bemused. She'd assumed magic rituals would be a serious
affair. The way Mi Soon kept popping from one form to another, cracking
jokes, knocking back beer and smoking rapidly dissuaded her from that
opinion. There was now a mirror, an incense burner and twelve candles
arrayed on a large slab of timber in the centre of the living room
floor. The two pieces of Ranma's hair were wrapped tightly round what Mi
Soon called a 'blank' incense stick. The Amazon elder had spent the last
half an hour carving a complex pattern into the piece of wood, which
happened to be the top of an old table, using her fancy dagger (which
she referred to as an 'athame') an old coal chisel and Ryoga's Swiss
army knife.
"Okay, we're all set. Anyone got a light?"
Ryoga handed over her Zippo.
"Hey, nice lighter. World War Two, isn't it?"
"Yeah, my mother's dad pinched it off a Yank soldier during the
occupation."
Mi Soon nodded and lit the candles in no discernible order.
She held the lighter up and grinned at the small crowd that had formed.
"Well, this is the moment of truth."
Mi Soon lit the incense stick.

***********************************

Mi Soon sat back.
"What the flying fuck?"
Ryoga frowned at her.
"What the what?"
She pointed at the mirror.
"They're still in this universe."
Ryoga grabbed her by the ear and yanked the old werewolf round.
"So what the fuck does that mean?"
"By the look of it something distracted the magi who was casting that
spell halfway through - probably one of Herb's ki blasts. They're
definitely still in this universe. Which makes life one hell of a lot
easier."
"What kind of somewhere in this universe you mean old goat?"
"I mean they're still on this planet. I mean they got displaces a few
thousand miles instead of getting mindwiped and blown into a random
dimension."
"Mindwiped?"
"That's what I said. Unless my nose fooled my, the spell my erstwhile
colleagues used is one that locks the target's memories away and sends
them somewhere they'll never come back - without being lethal. Herb
screwed it up very badly indeed. I guess all that happened was they got
sent somewhere else."
Ryoga snorted.
"I fuckin' hope so, old woman. Because if I end up havin' ta cure my
brother of amnesia I'm gonna seriously damage someone."
"Whatever. Xian Pu, get John Kirth in here, would you? I could use his
help on this one. Once-"
Nabiki shook her head. "He isn't there to be found, he took off just
after the battle and nobody's seen his since. I'm going to speak to a
few friends - see if they can find out where he went. You try to
pinpoint Ranma's location, OK?"
Mi Soon nodded.
"Good. Well, see what you can find. Change of plans, Xian Pu darling.
Tell Po Da I need to get into contact with Red Hanovan. And once you've
done that take Ranko and see if you can find Mortise's leathers in the
mess that's left over from the fight - there should be enough of his
dust in them to rematerialise the poor silly boy. Mao Xing, talk to your
Triad pals. We are probably going to need transport on the quiet."
Nabiki shook her head again.
"I can handle transport. Let me know as soon as you've managed to locate
Ranma. I'll arange something. Just do it."
She turned and stalked out the room. Mao Xing frowned after her.
"She moody today."
Akane shrugged.
"I'm not suprised. She's been gone on Ranma for nearly a month."

***********************************

Lin-Lin stared into the fire at the bottom end of the Gathering Hall;
she was surrounded by around two hundred of her fellow Amazon warriors.
All of them had the same thing preying on their minds; Ranma needed
help.
It was a good twenty minutes before anyone said anything, and it was
Tiger who finally decided to break the silence.
"I think we should all go."
There was another dead silence, filled only by the crackle of the fire,
people shifting from one position to another and stifled coughs.
Lin-Lin looked up and swept a ferocious look around the room.
"I'll say it loud and I'll say it now. I respect Ranma Saotome as much
as I respect any of our elders, and I love him like he was my brother.
He's in trouble, so is our sometimes ally Prince Herb of the Musk and
Ranma's father-in law Soun Tendo. I don't know about anyone else, but
I'm going to go and do my damnedest to get all three of them the hell
back here where they belong, and I don't really give a shit if I get
killed in the process. Ranma's worth twenty of me, and anyway we're
supposed to be Amazon warriors. It's our job to protect our menfolk."
Another warrior - a girl named Su Long, she'd defected from the
Conservatives during the First Battle - sat forwards.
"And suppose we don't get him back. Suppose we all get killed in the
attempt. What then?"
Tiger snorted, forestalling Lin-Lin's outburst before it started.
"Then at least we'll go out like warriors, and at least we'll have
tried. I am going."
Su Long nodded.
"Very well. If I die in this mission I will die as an Amazon should -
with my gun in my hand and a battle cry on my lips. I too go."
Her statement opened the floodgates. Lin-Lin had to suppress a grin.
"Then I say everyone who can fight for worth a damn or shoot straight
should go. Who's with me?"
There was the traditional rattle of swords and guns being drawn and the
collected Reformist Amazons rose.
"To victory!"

And another one bites the dust.

NOTES
Next - Look out USA, you have a Clan Saotome inbound...
Laters,
Calum 'Doghead' Wallace.

GLOSSARY OF TERMS
Alternator - Higher tech version of a generator.

Artic - The UK term for a semi truck. Short for 'articulated lorry'.

Binned - crashed. Normally means written off. Derived from 'bin' as in
'rubbish bin' (the British term for a trash can)

Chain lube - Motorbike chain lubrication oil. Comes in a spray can and
looks a bit like snot.

Conrod (connecting rod) - The bit of metal that connects the piston to
the crankshaft. Shaped approximately like a flat dumbbell.

Engine clicking - An internal combustion engine heats up when run. Run
it hard and it heats up more, then when you switch off the engine will
start emitting a series of sharp clicks as the metal cools and
contracts.

Final drive - the drive chain that goes from the gearbox to the back
wheel and the cogs (final drive sprockets) that it runs on. Not to be
confused with the primary drive - the chain/sprocket or belt/pulleys
between the engine and gearbox.

Gasflowing - trimming off excess metal from inside the cylinder heads to
aid the burn rate of fuel within the engine. Gives a small horsepower
boost.

Gixer - Slang for a Suzuki GSXR (one of the craziest bikes they make).

Header tank - Tank that contains the spare water for the radiator on a
sealed cooling system as found in most cars and some high performance
bikes.

Honda CG125 - Small single - cylinder 4-stroke road bike. Not very much
of anything but supremely reliable and dirt cheap. It's reliability
stems from having very little to go wrong and a low - revving 4-stroke
engine.

Honda 250 Superdream - CB250. The next up the Honda model range from the
CG125 and just a bigger version of the same.

Honda 500 Superdream - CB500. A CB250 with a bigger bore and heavier
frame.

Honda Fireblade - Insane Honda sportsbike. Mad but beginning to show
it's age.

Kill switch - The engine's 'off' switch. Turns off power to the
ignition.

Kuso - As far as I know this is the Japanese translation of the word
'Shit'.

Lid / skidlid - Slang for a crash helmet.

Nitrous oxide - Laughing gas. A petrol - nitrous mix burns faster than a
petrol - air mix therefore produces more horsepower and more wear in the
engine.

Ratbike - A motorbike made to look as fucked up and unroadworthy as
possible while still being street legal. Normally painted flat black.

Steering damper - a long, thin shock absorber that fits between the
forks and the frame. Helps steady the steering. A steering damper is
essential for disabled bikers who have lost the use of one arm as
without it there's no way you'd be able to steer at low speed or pull
away one armed.

Stocker - unmodified factory-built vehicle; I think this comes from the
term 'sales stock'.

Supercharger - A pump driven off the crank that forces more air into the
engine thus forcing it to run faster.

Toby - An Inverness Collegeism; slang meaning something along the lines
of widget, gizmo or thingy. Derived from angling parlarance (toby = a
small wooden fish used as a lure.) May be related to the epithet 'Toby
Tishbein' and can be said 'Tobyracho' for no apparent reason. (I'm not
making this up! Honest!)

Top yoke - The yokes are two pieces of metal that hold the front forks
together and  to the bike. The top yoke is the upper one. Known as
triple clamps in the US.

JASDF - Japanese Air Self Defence Force. The Japanese air force.

JGSDF - Japanese Ground Self Defence Force. The ground forces arm of the
Japanese military.

JSDF - Japanese Self Defence Force. The collective Japanese armed
forces.

What likes - Slack Scottish grammar. Means something along the lines of
'please could you explain that'. Only considerably less posh.

Wheelie bin - a square green plastic trashcan about the size of a normal
bin, with a flip top and two wheels.