Genma Ga Kutsushita Guujin Desu! Part 2: Akane Hates Laundry! By Sean D'Anna ===== The title of this means literally. "Genma is a sock puppet!" I'd have explained this sooner, but it would have ruined the surprise of the first part. ^_^ The second part is very short. There is an explination on why at the end. Enjoy the insanity anyway though. ^_^ +++++++++++++++++ Ranma Saotome was sitting by himself with his puppet looking at him. "School?" "Yes, we are going to be staying a while," said Genma as he nodded. Which was little more than Ranma moving his hand up and down, but why nit-pick? Nabiki poked her head around the corner and frowned at the boy. "Shit. He's still here..." "What?" muttered Akane irritably from behind her. "What's he doing?" "Talking too himself about going to school," grumbled Nabiki. "Oh no!" whispered Akane as she paled. "I know, we've got to stop this!" agreed Nabiki. "What do you mean you know? You're not engaged to him!" "Well you should have let him walk out last night!" said the older girl as she frowned at her sister. "Sorry," muttered Akane sheepishly. Nabiki walked across the open door as if she hadn't been listening too the conversation. "Hey Ranma, there's a high school nearby that might take you." The boy looked up at her and blinked. "Huh?" "It's in Juuban, not too far away. You can just take the train. They don't even have entrance exams!" The girl looked quite pleased with herself. "That's all right Nabiki. I took the liberty of enrolling my son at Furinkan. He'll be going with you." Akane burst around the corner. "What?!" "Well, it only makes sense, you are engaged after all," said Genma calmly. "We are not engaged!" chorused Ranma and Akane angrily. "How the hell did you manage to pull that off?" said Nabiki as she frowned at the sock. ++++++++++++++++ Vice Principal Dunbar blinked at the boy who had walked into his office with a sock puppet on his arm. "Can I help you?" "Yes, I'd like to enroll my son in school." The boy's lips never moved, in fact, he seemed like he was sleeping. A thin line of drool was dripping from the corner of his mouth. "Um. Son?" muttered the man. "Yes, his name is Ranma Saotome. These are his records," said the sock calmly as he pulled out a thick folder from the boy's shirt. "Um, yes," muttered the man dumbly. "Excuse me," said Genma as he stopped long enough to scratch his son's crotch. He then turned to look at the man again. "When will he be attending?" muttered the man. He wasn't quite sure what else to say. "He should start at the beginning of the week. We'll be staying with an old friend of mine. I believe his daughters attend here. His name is Soun Tendo." "Yes," said the man as he accepted the folder and stared at it for a minute. The boy and his sock left the room quietly while he sat there staring at the records. The man blinked several times and then turned to a small bottle of scotch that rested on the corner of his desk. He opened the drawer below it and slid it inside off of his desk. After that he hung his head and cried. "I hate my life." +++++++++++++++++++ "Well, good luck Akane!" said Nabiki as she dashed away from the scene. "Wait! I'll go with you!" cried the younger girl desperately. "He's your fiancee, you take him," replied the girl as she quickly rounded the corner at a full sprint. +++++++++++++++ Ranma walked behind Akane along the top of the fence. Neither looked particularly interested in each other as they walked along. "We're not getting married you know," growled the girl. "Tell me about it," was his reply. "So don't hang around me in school" snapped Akane. "Don't worry! I can't stand macho chicks like you!" retorted Ranma. Akane hefted her bag to throw it at him. Ranma promptly solved her problem by himself. His sock slammed into the back of his head, she hadn't even seen him put it on. "Pop! What the heck are you..." Genma interrupted. "You're in no position to be picky about women! Listen here boy, I'll tell you only once!" Ranma promptly swept his own feet out from under him and crashed into the canal. She grinned at the sock and switched it for the panda form sock. "What's wrong pop? Weren't you gonna say somethin?" The sock growled as the girl jumped back onto the sidewalk. The pair fought for a moment and Ranma landed in front of an old woman emptying out a bucket of water over her doorstep. The frail old woman looked up and blinked a she found herself face to face with a black and white object that stared at her dumbly. "GAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" She backed away with her hand over her heart and quickly rushed into her home. Ranma wasn't sure why, but she felt oddly satisfied by this event. She did stop to look down at herself and realized that she was currently female. "Crap." "You dope! What did you think would happen?" snapped Akane. "Humph. Pop must have splashed me when I had my guard down," said the redhead. Akane pulled at her hair in frustration. "I think I'll go take a bath," said Ranma as she turned back towards the way they had come from. "You'll be...lat..." Akane realized what she was saying and stopped. "Okay. I'll see you later then." Ranma frowned. "You're right, I'll be late. I don't want to start school as a girl though!" "Good point, just go home and take a bath. Isn't there a spring or something in China that will cure you?" asked the girl as she offered him a small frown. "All you need is hot water?" said a familiar voice from behind them. Akane felt the hairs on the back of her neck bristle suddenly. "Oh no! Please no!" "Huh?" Ranma turned around to find a friendly looking man in his late twenties smiling at her. "It's nice to meet you," said the man as he and the skeleton in his grasp bowed deeply. "If you need hot water for something, just come by my office. It's on the way." Ranma blinked and nodded. "Hey. Thanks." "Um, good morning, Dr. Tofu!" muttered Akane nervously. Genma in his panda form appeared behind Akane's head. "Boy! Quit stalling!" The girl backhanded the offending sock and it vanished from sight just as the doctor looked in that direction. "That's odd, I thought I saw something there..." "Huh? Oh, that's just my..." Akane quickly covered the girl's mouth. "It's nothing." The man blinked and started to walk towards his office with the pair. +++++++++++++++++ After about a minute the trio arrived outside of the office. Tofu looked at Akane and smiled. "Why don't you just wait here. I'll take Ranma inside and get her that water." The girl blushed and didn't really want to say yes, but couldn't think of an excuse before the pair was gone. ++++++++++++++++++ Ten minutes went by and Akane frowned. "What's taking them so long?" She began to grow nervous and glanced towards the door. Finally, she sighed and walked inside. "Ranma? Dr. Tofu?" The office was empty. That was when she heard what sounded like Ranma crying. "What the?" She poked her head around the corner and found Tofu and Ranma sitting across from each other. Ranma was bawling his eyes out, and Tofu had a serious looking frown on his face. "And sometimes Pop touches me! You know! There!" cried the redhead. "This is awful!" muttered the doctor as he looked thoughtful. "Have you contacted the proper authorities?" "They just laugh at me!" "Hmmm. How does he touch you Ranma? Can you tell me about it?" Akane was white as a sheet. "Yeah. Sometimes I get an itch ya know. He just grabs me and scratches it with his mouth!" "His mouth?" muttered Tofu as his eyes widened. "Yeah. Pop likes to use is mouth," sputtered Ranma through her tears. "It feels weird!" "I imagine so, for someone as young as you," muttered the man as he nodded. "Very traumatizing. You must understand Ranma. What he's doing is wrong! This has to be dealt with, or he'll probably keep doing it too you. I can tell you don't like it, but..." Ranma nodded as she wiped the tears off of her face. "Yeah." Tofu frowned and stood up. "I think I've taken up enough of your time. We should talk later, perhaps after school? It would be best if we kept this from your father for now." The redhead nodded and accepted the cup of hot water from the man. She stood up and sniffled as she turned away and walked towards the door. +++++++++++++++++ Akane was standing outside the office as pale as a ghost. She shivered at the thought of what she had heard. Maybe that was why Ranma was the way he was? Could it be? A deep pang of sympathy went out towards the boy as he emerged from the office as fresh as when he'd gone in. He seemed much more cheerful as he dumped the water over his head and changed. "Ah. That's better." "Maybe that's why he's all alone? Maybe that's why he hates to be a girl so much!" thought Akane in horror. "Could it be? Mr. Saotome is really a pervert!?" She followed after the boy in silence as he walked towards the school. As they grew nearer, she seemed to remember something. Her face grew hard and she charged forward at full sprint. Ranma kept up easily from behind her and stared rather dumbly at the scene. A large crowd of boys was waiting at the school gate. The girl in front of him dashed headlong into the mess and began to beat the living daylights out of anyone who stood in her way. "Um..." Nabiki Tendo gasped as she sat the boy sitting on the wall watching the scene. "No! He made it here?" She growled irritably and leaned out the window. "Ranma! Maybe you should go home, I think classes will be canceled because of injuries!" The boy looked up at her and blinked. "What's going on?" He failed to notice the weird looks everyone surrounding the girl were giving her from her perch in the window. Akane finished up her battle as the last of the male student's fell from her path. "Honestly! Every morning! You'd think they'd have learned by now!" "Truly such a boorish lot," said a definitely masculine voice from behind a nearby tree. "Evidently they each intend to take you out, on the dawn that they finally defeat you!" Akane caught a rose that was tossed to her and sighed. "Oh. Upperclassman, good morning!" The boy ignored her and smiled. "And now, might you spar with me?" He held a wooden sword out and pointed it at her. Ranma jumped down beside her and landed lightly. "Boy. You're popular aren't you?" "Who are you?" snapped Akane. "What? You brought me here remember?" said Ranma in confusion. "I don't want to be associated with you!" she growled under her breath. "Get lost." "Okay. Jeez," muttered the boy as he looked at the tall boy. The older student had taken notice of him. "Who are you boor? Aren't you being awfully familiar with Akane?" "Huh? Yeah. Kinda," said Ranma as he thought about it for a moment. "I'm..." "Ah! Is it not the custom to give one's own name first? Fine then, mine I shall give!" cried the boy loudly. "Man, what a loon," muttered Ranma. "Who are you to talk?" grumbled Akane sourly. "I am Tatewaki Kuno! Captain of the Kendo club, undefeated new star of the high school fencing world, the sound of my voice sends fear into the hearts of my peers! They call me, the Blue Thunder of Furinkan High!" Nabiki and her friends were very interested in this new development. "Blue Thunder?" "You heard that before?" "News to me," responded Nabiki calmly. She was thinking it might be kind of fun to watch Kuno pound the little weirdo. "Okay. Well I'm staying at the Tendo Dojo..." "What? Under the same roof as Akane? I shall not allow it!" cried Kuno as he slashed at the boy with his bokken. Ranma jumped into a flip and avoided the strike. He took off his bag as he went and landed in a combat stance. "I am Ranma Saotome, of the Anything Goes School of Martial Arts! I accept your challenge!" The pair collided in battle, Ranma clearly showing the superior skill. Finally, it all came down to a single blow. The sky overhead rumbled angrily as the gentle rain showered down on the two combatants. Ranma's fingers touched Kuno's forehead, and the Kendoist was slashing in a missed strike that passed by the boy's neck. The students gasped in awe as Ranma's feet hit the ground. He felt the rain touching his skin and the feeling of the change grew stronger. Quickly, he pulled Genma onto his arm and it lashed out, taking Kuno in the chest hard. A red and black blur shot towards the building and into a storage shed. The students were dumbfounded. "Was that a sock puppet?" "I dunno, but whatever it was, it was really good!" The boy who said that was promptly smacked by all surrounding him. "Ouch! Hey!" Akane merely stood in the rain, staring at the scene in a sort of shocked stupor. "I...my life is over!" She rushed after Ranma and his puppet, following them into the storage closet. "Damn! If it hadn't rained, I'd have nailed that moron with one..." "I wouldn't be so sure," said Akane as she opened the window and climbed inside the room with them. "Huh?" muttered Ranma dumbly. Genma was currently holding a kettle in his mouth, and was apparently in his panda form. "I mean your throat," replied Akane as she pointed at the bruise that had formed there. "Wow. He didn't even touch me!" "If he had, you'd be breathing through your neck now. A pretty even match don't you think?" "Oh, I don't know about that." Akane stared at the boy for a moment and realized that he was scratching himself with his sock puppet. She got a revolted look on her face and gasped. "Pop! You animal! In front of Akane no less! I told ya ta quit doin that ta me!" The girl blinked at this. "Huh?" "Well if I don't, you'll just have to itch then!" said Genma's sign. "Fine!" snapped Ranma angrily. Akane promptly fell off her perch in the window and onto the floor. +++++++++++++++++ Kuno looked at the markings on his forehead with a small mirror and frowned. "Hmmm..." "And you don't remember him even touching you?" said Nabiki with her eyebrow arched a little. "Hmmm. I thought Ranma Saotome was good, but I shall never forget this offense of the sock puppet!" declared Kuno angrily. "He wrote that you're an idiot on your forehead and all you're worried about is that he hit you with a sock puppet?" said Nabiki as she frowned at the boy. "Boy, you really are an idiot." "You realize that I hate you," grumbled Kuno. "He spelled it wrong too," commented Nabiki. Kuno just sat there and pouted. "Ranma Saotome, I shall have my revenge!" +++++++++++++++++++ TBC... I cut it off here, because I realized that the rest of the Kuno arc would be largely unchanged from this point on. Genma has no real impact on the story, or even an appearance after this. So, I shall move on and skip a bit. Next time We'll start up with Tofu and Kasumi's story, and then go on to Ryoga. I've got a special surprise in store for you with that one. The next chapter should be considerably larger as well. So, until then, read Gaijin or something. ^_^