Celeste Byrd [nshampoo@gold.interlog.com]
21.03.1998 [March 21, 1998]

Rating: Most audiences approved.

Ranma 1/2 is copyrighted 1998 by Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan Inc. and anyone else who rightfully owns the copyrights. All-Purpose Cultural Cat Girl Nuku Nuku is copyrighted 1992 by Yuuzou Takada. This fanfic was written entirely for entertainment purposes and NOT for monetary benefit. Please don't sue me. Any similarities with other fanfics are purely coincidental unless stated otherwise.

This is my second attempt at a decent fanfic. This also happens to be my first attempt at prose. Be lenient.

Information is based on the author's experience of the two series, meaning a truckload of Ranma 1/2 but an OAV and a few fics of Nuku Nuku. Japanese will only be used when necessary, and NOT to show that this author can look up lots of words and phrases she does not understand in a Japanese-English dictionary, or show that she can write Japanese in English when others don't have a clue what any of it means.

Some parts of this fanfic were influenced by Terry Pratchett's Discworld novels. If you haven't read any of them, shame on you.

If you've just stumbled upon this, please read the previous chapters to understand anything in this one.

"Ranma my boy, where are you?"

"Here I am, poppa."

"Where? I don't see you!"

"Up here."

"Ah! Still practicing that technique I taught you, eh? Good. A true martial artist practices day and night until he has mastered any difficult move. You remind me of my younger times. Oh, the training... I heard you went to bed late last night. Where were you?"

"Practicing like you told me to, poppa."

"Good! No sacrifice is too great for the art. Even at ten years old you do your old man proud!"

"Thanks, father!"

"Now, I want you to learn the most powerful technique in the world; a technique so powerful no demon has dared oppose it. Even your own dad hasn't attempted to try it! But, if you master it, you'll bring honour to the Saotome School and name!"

"Wow, what do I have to do to learn it?"

"Well, first you wrap this around you like so."

"Okay. But what IS this stuff, poppa?"

"Fish sausages."

RANMA 1/2  and  ALL-PURPOSE CULTURAL CAT-GIRL NUKU NUKU
PROJECT NK-RANMA
Written by Celeste Byrd

CHAPTER THREE: The Other Side

"Ranma? Ranma?"

Ranma tried looking around him but could not see anything at all. It was as if a small spotlight was being shone on him from above, blinding him, preventing him from seeing beyond. He took a step, winced and looked down. He was sure his leg wasn't supposed to look like that, but it was hard to be sure of anything at the moment. He absent-mindedly rubbed his shoulder.

"Ranma? Ranma?"

He limped forward a few metres before staggering back again. Who was calling him? Where was he? Was this the afterlife? Was he dead? He took another look and snorted.

"If this is all to it, I'm wasting my time here. It's just a stupid flesh wound, after all. I don't remember dying and I sure ain't going to start!"

"What DOES Ranma remember?" the voice called out again.

Ranma attempted the EVER-so-complicated task of pinpointing the origin of the voice. And it was. The voice seemed to echo around him, reverberating against walls he could not see. He finally decided to content himself by simply staying put. If some mysterious voice wanted to talk to him so badly, it'd have to show itself first.

"No, it doesn't."

Ranma was now beginning to get incredibly pissed off. He didn't know where he was, his leg still hurt, he couldn't see, and someone was reading the back of his mind!

"Who the hell are you?" Ranma yelled.

There was a chuckle in the darkness, and a figure stepped into his line of vision. Ranma whirled on it and picked it up by the scurf of its neck.

"What's the big idea--?!" he yelled before realizing WHAT he had picked up. Ranma immediately screamed and froze up, dropping the body to the ground.

The small furry cat sighed, then changed its appearance to that of a young man with sharp emerald eyes and catlike ears. If it were not for these small details, he could have passed as Ranma's twin, and with just cause. There was the same dark hair tied in a tight pigtail. There were the same high cheekbones, the same firm musculature. Ranma's mother would have been proud. When he finally calmed down, he found himself looking into a mirror. At least, that's what he thought before the mirror spoke.

"Is Ranma better now?" the feline doppelganger asked.

Ranma indignantly pulled himself up. He was Saotome Ranma, eighteen years of age, the best martial artist of his time, and he damn well wasn't going to be afraid of some stupid cat-demon!

"Even in Ranma's subconscious he's afraid of cats. This is funny," the cat-boy laughed. "One of the greatest martial artists in the world can't even stand up to his own mind!"

Ranma was about to retort when something his counterpart said hit home.

"My own mind?! Ya mean..." Ranma began.

"...that Ranma is dreaming? Yes. That Ranma is really asleep? Yes. That all this is not real? No. It's the only way to talk to Ranma without spooking him right now."

"You've already done THAT already."

"Ranma-Neko would've talked to Ranma sooner, but all those metal things were there and it was fun to play with them!"

"Fun to play...? You mean you're the one who took over my mind?"

"Took over Ranma's mind? Ranma-Neko IS a part of Ranma's mind, dolt!"

"Yeah yeah, whatever. So it's your fault for what I did back there!"

"So Ranma DOES remember what happened!"

"Whatyamean, I..." Ranma trailed off as the events in the facility replayed back to him with alarming clarity. He remembered a red haze falling over him and causing him to level the entire complex with a well-placed dragon's blast. Ranma mentally struggled with himself as he thought about his berserker rage. Why did he attack so violently? He could have just surrendered and let them lead him to their leader or whatever. They might have even let him go. "But nooo, you arrogant moron," he thought, "you just HAD to level the place. Why?"

"Ranma knows the reason, he's a student of the Anything-Goes School of Martial Arts. There is NO such thing as surrender!"

"Hey, shut up you, I'm trying to argue with my subconscious here. It's your fault I did that back there!"

"No, it's not. It's our fault."

"How can it be OUR fault?!" There was a pause. "Why are you taking over my mind...?!"

Ranma-Neko sighed. "No one took over anyone's mind. Ranma-Neko is... a... part... of... Ranma's... mind!"

The message and the little details finally kicked into Ranma's thick skull. It's not that Ranma's not very bright, it's just that when he thinks of something, it takes a long time for him to let go of it. He's like a freight train. Hard to de-rail.

"So, I guess you're my cat side?" he asked warily.

"Yes. Whenever Ranma's fear of cats goes over the edge, Ranma-Neko takes over!"

"Why'dya take so long to TELL me all this?!"

Ranma-Neko looked away. A small tear formed and slowly worked its way down his cheek. He carefully wiped it away, afraid Ranma would see it. Ranma-Neko turned back to him.

"Don't know. Before, Ranma-Neko had no idea Ranma existed. Safer that way. When Ranma was playing with those machines, Ranma-Neko suddenly felt strange. Why was there someone in Ranma-Neko's head?"

"But it's NOT your head."

Ranma-Neko glared at him and Ranma hastily moved back. There was the suspicion of fire in those green eyes...

"Yes, it is! Does Ranma even KNOW what he is?"

Ranma drew himself up. Even if he WAS talking to his feline side, he would not be intimidated by anyone! Well, except for his mother, and Akane, and Nabiki, and Kodachi, and...

"Ranma is lucky to have mother. Ranma-Neko has nothing."

Ranma looked up. Why the change in topic? Ranma-Neko wasn't looking at him, but he could tell he was crying. Not one who knew much in the emotional department, Ranma silently waited for him to continue. It wasn't long in coming.

"Eight years ago, Ranma-Neko was hit by a car. Was still a kitten then, and almost dead. When woke up, Ranma-Neko felt weird, as if in a different body. Moved funny. Then didn't feel anything. When Ranma-Neko woke up again, he didn't know where he was but saw a big cat. It was fun to play with it, but then it ran away. Then, this girl gave me some catnip, and then I don't know what happened. Didn't know eight years had passed. Now, Ranma-Neko finds out someone else is in his mind for all this time and he can't do anything about it!"

Ranma-Neko sat down, staring at the floor. Ranma sat down beside him quietly. Ranma-Neko then turned and looked at him.

"I don't mind having Ranma in brain, but after eight years Ranma-Neko wants to move around by himself. Wants to see everything Ranma is seeing. Do things Ranma is doing. How long do I have to wait? Ranma-Neko wants to have fun! No fun staying with Ranma in weird body if Ranma-Neko can't use it too."

"Why can't you use it if I let you?" Ranma asked.

"Ranma didn't even know Ranma-Neko existed as a person until now. Only now Ranma-Neko talk to you. When asleep."

Ranma has the thickest skull on the planet. He has the biggest ego in the universe. He was a proclaimed macho sexist pig. And yet, he couldn't stand to see anybody hurt. He had more morals than any normal teenage boy; perhaps more than the average adult. He was kind-hearted, and free-spirited, and had lived his entire life by the code of Bushido.

When Akane got mad and hit him for no reason at all, he always tried to apologize later even if he wasn't the offender. When Shampoo cried because of what he said, Ranma always tried to comfort her and explain what he really meant. And then, the engagement... Ranma had tried desperately to make it work, but lately Akane would react to the tiniest little thing...

So when he saw how downhearted Ranma-Neko was, his brain worked furiously to come up with a solution. He wasn't entirely convinced he was in this other person's mind, but it DID explain certain... traits of his.

"I think you could try and stay in my head while I'm awake. I don't know if it'll work, but we gotta try. Just no funny stuff, okay?"

"Thank you."

Ranma was startled. "For what?" he asked.

"For trying to help Ranma-Neko, and for listening to him."

"Hey, no problem. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to wake up now. I'll think of something to fix this whole mess. And who knows, I might have a few of my OWN questions answered..."

The first thing Nabiki noticed when she got home was the lack of people. They were all in the living room, her father, Mr. Saotome, and Kasumi, watching the television. Akane and Ranma were nowhere to be found.

"Kasumi, where are the lovebirds?" Nabiki asked as she removed her shoes.

"Shh," she whispered.

Curious to what was the centre of attention, Nabiki tuned in to the set...

"...destroying about a fifth of the Mishima Heavy Industries real estate. Authorities have not confirmed if the explosion was accidental or an act of terrorism. The CEO of MHI had said earlier today that this unfortunate incident was a result of a..."

Nabiki's ears perked up at the mention of MHI. She had a huge interest in the manufacturing company, particularly the future CEO. After all, she was only the richest woman in Japan...

When the newsflash was over, the entire household came back to life as the men continued their game and Kasumi went into the kitchen to make lunch. Nabiki felt left out, so she promptly went into the kitchen to talk to Kasumi.

"What was that about?" she asked.

Kasumi looked up at Nabiki and smiled. "Welcome home, Nabiki! I'm sorry I didn't greet you earlier." She pulled out a knife and started to chop some vegetables.

"Yeah. What, oh right. Um, what exactly did they say on the TV?"

Kasumi thought for a moment. "I think they were talking about an explosion at the Mishima Heavy Industries."

Nabiki rolled her eyes. "I know that," she said, "but why did everyone suddenly drop what they were doing to watch a newsflash?"

Kasumi looked innocently at her. "Well, it did seem strange that such a big explosion occurred. And the fact a dragon went flying into the sky."

"Um, where's Ranma and Akane?"

"I think Akane's in the dojo right now, but I don't know about Ranma," Kasumi replied.

"Thanks Kasumi," said Nabiki. She walked out to the practice hall, paused, and put her ear to the door. There was the sound of wood being splintered and the cries of "Ranma you jerk" emanating from within. Nabiki pulled her ear back and smiled faintly.

"Well," thought Nabiki wryly, "no doubt where Akane is, but where's Ranma?"

One thing that puzzled Nabiki was how Kasumi always managed to suggest something in her innocent little way. Just like in the kitchen...

Nabiki froze. "Hey, waitaminute here. Did she say a 'dragon' flew into the sky?" she thought. "There's one thing I know when it comes to dragons..."

Nabiki went up to her room, closed the door behind her, and walked to her desk. Reaching underneath the desk, Nabiki pulled out a cell phone.

"Ranma always has something to do with them," she finished. She checked her ledger for a certain phone number, took note of it and turned on the phone.

"If he's doing anything worth blackmailing..." Nabiki thought as she dialed the number, "I'll be one of the first to know."

"Ranma, Ranma, Ranma. You are a disgrace to the Saotome name! How can you become a true master of the martial arts if you can't stand up to a few hungry kitty cats?"

"Poppa, it hurts. Those cats, tearing at me... I don't wanna do it again! Make them go away! No..."

"Silence, boy! A true martial artist never gives up! Now, here's some fish cake. Try and learn the technique!"

"But father, I don't wanna..."

"Nonsense, boy! They hurt you as much as I do when I train you! Now make your old man happy! How do you expect to carry the mantle of the Saotome Anything-Goes School of Martial Arts without a little pain?"

"Poppa... please... not again..."

Ranma slowly regained consciousness. Without opening his eyes, he could tell his arms and legs were being restrained. He could feel himself on a table of some sort, for the coolness of the metal was prickling his back. Above him, Ranma could hear the hushed whispering of several people. Six or seven, he mused.

"Wow, so weird."

Ranma was startled for a moment before realizing it was his feline side talking. Chalk one up for the good guys, he thought. Now to find out who're the bad guys... He wondered briefly for a moment if he could direct his thoughts to Ranma-Neko without actually having to talk aloud.

"Yes."

Ranma mentally glared at him, while Ranma-Neko smiled playfully. There was something odd about him, Ranma was sure about that. It was the way you couldn't stay angry with him. Ranma had only known Ranma-Neko for a few minutes, but it seemed like they had been together for years. Dropping the matter, Ranma returned to the real world.

He sensed his restrainers were scrutinizing him, for Ranma could feel the heat of their gazes on his face. Ranma decided to remain still and listen to their conversation while Ranma-Neko dozed off.

"...Well defined, I must say."

"Why is he shackled?"

"Wouldn't you want someone like him helpless before you? Look at that body!"

A series of giggles. Ranma mentally groaned. He REALLY hoped they were joking!

"Seriously girls, an hour ago he completely wrecked one of the testing facilities." The whispering died down.

"Which one?"

"I heard it was TSI."

"What? Isn't that one..."

"Underground? Yes."

Silence.

"How exactly did he go through ten metres of concrete?"

Ranma stifled a laugh.

"I still think he's cute, though."

Murmurs of agreement. Despite being chained, Ranma couldn't help but feel his pride swell at the comment. And we all know how big an ego he has. Ranma-Neko woke up, looked at Ranma and merely shook his head.

"He's probably awake now."

Ranma gave up and opened his eyes. Several faces, all female, were peering down at him. Suddenly feeling extremely self-conscious, Ranma moved as if to cover his exposed chest until he remembered the restraints.

"I suppose I'm not here to be offered a cup of tea, am I?" he asked.

A few of the faces moved away to be replaced by another one. This one despite being very pretty had a cold calculating look, reminding Ranma of Nabiki. He fought to avoid looking at her. This face examined him for an instant before asking him a simple question.

"Who are you?"

Feeling that giving his name wouldn't hurt him a bit, he replied "Saotome Ranma."

If the woman recognized the name she didn't show it. Ranma found himself dreading that woman's voice. He kept waiting for it to lash out and bite him on the arm.

"What did you do at the facility?"

Ranma was about to snort and taste the insides of his soles when something in the back of his mind ("Ranma-Neko," he remembered later) told him to answer the question politely, with none of his usual smartass remarks. He collected his thoughts and took a deep breath.

"I landed into your 'facility' and was trying to find my way out when I was stopped by some machine. The machine told me to put my hands up in the air or it would open fire. Several more came into the room and trained their weapons on me. Another machine came in and argued with the first one, and then the first one started shooting at me. So did the others. I dodged several shots before taking a couple in the shoulder and the side. I got angry, and dismembered many of the machines. When the first one shot me with something, I got even angrier and tore it apart. Then I blew everything up. It was pretty fun, actually!" Ranma mentally punched himself. He was starting to talk like his... feline side! Ranma-Neko smirked.

The interrogator looked surprised, as if she wasn't expecting the 'prisoner' to talk, least in such a carefree manner. Once she removed her face from his sight, Ranma could hear bits and pieces of a hushed argument.

"...sure Natsume sent him..."

"...did you see the video?..."

"...human, that shoulder..."

"...at leg, you idiot..."

"...scan says..."

"...can't be, humans can't..."

Ranma listened for a while before getting bored with the entire exchange. This for him was the most opportune time to look around. Tilting his head to one side, Ranma noticed the walls were lined with state-of-the-art technology, insofar as being large and made of metal. Anything other than swords, knives and spatulas were considered top-notch to him. Trying to lift his wrist, Ranma briefly considered his options. He could break free and run like hell, but they probably anticipated that he would, and had set up more mechs in the corridor. He figured it was a good idea, but he was too weak to fight and needed some more rest. He could just lay here and wait to see what would happen next, but his fighting spirit told him this was a cowardly way to get out of here. It was then another voice interrupted his thoughts.

"How did you destroy the facility?"

Ranma felt annoyed. He had already answered that, for crying out loud! "I've already said, I blew it up," he answered sharply.

"We are not asking how it was destroyed, we are asking how YOU destroyed it."

Ranma considered the question. "Isn't that the same thing?" he asked.

There was a sigh. "Who sent you?"

Ranma thought about it. How could he explain a violent tomboy punted him into the sky and caused him to plow through ten metres of concrete? How could he explain surviving?

"Well... I can't really explain it. It's too complicated enough for me..."

"If you're not going to be cooperative, we will use force."

Ranma looked shocked for a moment. "You wouldn't dare."

"Yes, we will. In fact, we'll demonstrate if necessary."

Ranma was about to think of an answer to that when Ranma-Neko spoke for him.

"Will there be more machines to play with?" he asked. Several people in the room gasped, while the others nodded their heads in affirmation.

"What are you doing?!" Ranma thought harshly. Ranma-Neko turned to him, a big smile plastered on his face.

"No worries. Ranma-Neko knows what he's doing!"

Ranma-Neko yanked hard on the restraints. They resisted for a moment, then broke away. Rubbing his wrists, Ranma-Neko tensed and leaped from the table and onto a fixture in the ceiling. He stopped to lick his hand when the fixture pulled loose and began to fall. Ranma-Neko used the fixture as leverage to jump across the room...

...And into the arms of a giant mecha. Ranma-Neko had no time to react when it slammed him back onto the table and reapplied the restraints. The interrogator grinned.

"What you see, Saotome Ranma, is one of Mishima's latest technological breakthroughs, achieved with years of military research!"

Ranma took back control of his mind and examined the machine critically.

"So you're saying," Ranma said slowly, "that you spent years of research on a bucket of bolts?"

The interrogator merely smiled. "Kyusaku did good work, but I'm afraid our bucket of bolts here could break down your body into a bucket of spare parts."

"N-nani?!"

Well, I can't just drop the serious theme right away. The 'fic will get too choppy if that happened...

I felt 'nani' would make generate better mood than 'what.' What doesn't seem to cut it here.

Anyway, I hope I kept the blasted thing consistent. If you think so, tell me at [nshampoo@gold.interlog.com]. Hell, tell me if you DON'T think so. I'm always open to suggestions.

Thanks again to Richard Lawson and Wade Tritschler for pre-reading this. I don't think I could continue without their support. Special thanks should also extend to anyone I forgot to mention (which is plenty).

The heat seems to be dying down in here. Good thing too, I don't think my computer can handle anymore...